Back In London

she was still crying when he broke away from the kiss. "No." she said looking at him and then to the ground. What if that girl he lived with would have walked in while they were kissing like that? She didn't know what she was supposed to do. Like Abbey she knew she needed something in her life but she wasn't quite sure what it was. She needed to stop being so damn needy. "I don't know whats wrong with me."

"I know sweetie...I know..." Varod whispered. He continued to stroke and play with her hair. "I will always love you. I will always need you. You are the greatest thing in my life Christy..."

"I need to stop being needy." she said looking at him. "I"m always having to depend on everyone to take care of me because I'm too unstable to do it myself!" she exclaimed. "I can't take it anymore. I'm tired of being treated like a baby because I don't know whats wrong. I wanna be fixed. I'm tired of being broken. Doesn't anyone get that anymore! I love you, but at the same time I hate you because of what you are and what I lost was the only chance we had at anything like that!"

"Christy! I'll help you!" Varod said over her. A mad gleam was in his eyes. "I'll make sure you get fixed! I'll make sure you get anything you need! Hell, if what it takes is leaving you to figure things out then I'll do it! I'm not happy about losing a child either but as long as we're together we can do this. Okay?"

"Didn't you hear what I just said?" she asked looking at him, "I hate what you had Sam do to you because now even if I'm ever ready to do that with you, we can't ever make another baby! It was your only chance to be a father and have your own kid and instead of growing older you're going to stay 15 for the rest of your life! Its not normal!" She had never let it come out that was why she hated what he was until now. She just figured he would have figured it out on his own. She had wanted to grow old with him, but now he was a vampire she couldn't. It confused her and she didn't like it one bit. She would have to watch herself grow old while he stayed young and she didn't want to do that. But she didn't want to become a vampire either. She wanted to grow old and die like she was supposed to.

"Normal?" Varod asked, his world shattering around him like glass. "Why on Earth would I want to be normal? If you don't want to be with a vampire so be it... But I love you and I always will. You could...I dunno. What could you do? If you don't want me okay. But I want you."

"I wanted to grow old with you!" she yelled at him now standing in the kitchen. "Don't you get that!? I wanted to grow old with you and watch our children grow up and have children of their own but that won't happen now...it can't ever happen because of what you had her do. I love you damnit but everything has gone to complete shit because of this!" She was confused about how he didn't understand what she was trying to say. He still thought everything was ok with what he did and she should just accept it but she couldn't. She couldn't because of her dreams of what she wanted with him. She had never asked for any of this. Nor did she think the boy that stole her heart and virginity on the Hogwarts train the first day they met would end up like this. Nor did she think she would be having to scream this at him either.

Varod stood up too and raised his arm. However, he didn't punch her. He punched the wall, leaving a large hole in it.

"I get it, okay? Go be with someone normal, and have kids and grow old. To me that's boring. Growing old? If I bit you now we'd be young forever. But nah, you'd rather be normal. That's fine with me. Later."

"Fine." she said looking at him, "You don't get it and you never will!" she said looking at him. "I'm not going to be quiet about it when you kept bugging me as to why it bothered me to see you this way and now you know and you want to act like that?" she asked looking at him. "I can go and find someone to treat me better than that. I don't need this right now. I should have never opened up to you in the first place!" she turned and walked towards the door and then faced him. "I wish to god I had never met you Varod Gilther!" she screamed slamming to door to his house tears running down her face. she hadn't even realized she had forgotten her shoes in his room.

Varod ran after her.

"Christy! Wait!" As soon as he caught up with her (admittedly not hard with vamp speed) he stood there. "Christy. Listen to me. If you want to be with me I'll do whatever it takes, but there isn't a cure. If there was I would have suggested it. I love you but apparently that's not all it takes. If you want someone normal okay. But if you want me there's nothing I can do but try to make it work."