The dark heart home

Jess cia sat out side in the back yard as Andrew played kicking his soccer ball around he smiled to her as she managed to kick it into a small goal set up at one end. Jessiac looked into a small rocking crib that hug from the roof both twins sound asleep in it. sitting back she sighed feling low , lower than she had ever even in the warm sunshine it didn't help , she sat with a tissue in her hand and wiped tears that seem to come from no where why was she like this she could do nothing but sit and cry sicne coming home from hospital.

Khaat came bringing one large package that held three separate gifts. She saw the clear signs of postpartum depression as she approached Jessica. It was sometimes normal for women to experience it after delivery. Khaat had a severe migraine today, and she was hoping that with both of them not at their best, that the visit would still go well.

"Hey, Jess, " she said, putting the brightly wrapped package down in front of Jess, "I just brought you a gift for the twins. I see its an off day for you."

jess nodded to her "yeah very " she said sniffing back tears "well sit down" she said loking for some where for her to sit moving up she made room her head hung low but not talking much but instead looking at her hands then sighing she wanted to stop but she felt as if somthing inside had broke and she could just not mend it no matter what she tried she could not shift her depreshion , she wanted to just crawl up her stairs and lock herself in her room for a week not sleep or eat just sit and cry.

thinking about it she hadn't really eaten properly since the hospital and except for the odd nibble not at all cince being home.he just didn't have the apatite any more

"Where's Jack?" Khaat asked, not liking what she saw. Jess just wasn't coping with this. And Khaat wanted to talk to Jack--before things got any worse. "This has gone on too long already, Jess. You know that. This has to stop. Now. Jack needs to know how much of a mess you are and what this is doing to you--and that you do not have to be this way. You can get help from St. Mungos if you don't want to feel this way."

jess looked at her and stood up "theres nothing wrong " she said "I'm feel ling low like you and your head aches " she said moving to look out over the garden "and this has nothing to do with jack, hes out tryng to find a job, thanks to ministry shake ups we both lost them" she took a step down into the garden but then sat on the steps her mind else where as she focused on the single flower in front of her slowly her arms wrapped around ehr as she could hold back her tears no more once started she could not stop "I can't cope, i feel like the whole worlds against me " she said threw her sobs.

"I have no idea what you're talking about," Khaat said quietly, "You have 3 gorgeous children. Jack was rehired at the Wizengamot, and I'm sure the auror position is just a formality. You're Order members. You know how important it is to do a thorough housecleaning. And in order for it to be done right, everyone has to go and then be rehired, otherwise it becomes a political nightmare. Matt has absolutely no choice. You have a wonderful bookstore, so I just don't get why you think the world is against you."

jesica looked up wiping her tears a she realised Khaat was right "Jacks got his job back?" she said turning to face her "you sure?" she stood up and moved to sit next to her as she took a long deep breath in "do you think the healers will have anything for the baby blues? and don't say baby pinks" she said giving a small smile as she wiped her tears from her cheek "look at me im such a mess" she said "I should be offering you coffee or tea not tears and sobs" she smiled again watching as andrew picked up the ball and rolled it before kicking it into the coal again this time squeeling in delight as it did.

"Yes. I know we do. We deal with postpartum depression all the time. Go stop by and see Daddy. I'm taking a few days off. His orders. He decided I was just too thin and he doesn't want me risking Abbey. I know you're going to laugh, but he actually snuck a medical leave slip with my name on it under my nose the other day. He stuck it in a stack of papers he said he needed me to sign. And I had such a terrible headache that I didn't pay one ounce of attention to what I was signing. He had appointed himself as my doctor, filled out the leave giving me at least 3 weeks off, and I cna't go back until he clears me. Isn't that just a kick? I'm the director and can't go back to my own hospital until I'm cleared. Now how wrong is that? Rob thought it was a stitch. He has me practically all to himself now. Well, almost."

jessica laughed "ow just like your father, and i will certainly go and see him we're due a check up i belive tomorrow " she smiled "well can i offer the director of st mongos hospital whos on sick leave, a coffee or is it still banned by your father?" she asked now feeling some what better "I may attempt to cook, note i said attempt" she chuckled "I haven't done it in years."

Jack walked out the kitchen door and looked at Jessica "wow what did you do last time i left her she was all doom and gloom" he said moving to tkae jessica in his arms "its good to see you smile again" he said kissing her with a sigh then turned to look at Khaat "you must be a good healer" .

Jessica stood and held him close smiling as she looked at Khaat "did you get your job back?" she asked looking up at him and grinning as he nodded "thats one thing back to normal, now theres just me" she said going on her tip toes to kiss him back.

"I'm fine," Khaat replied. "I did promise Rob I would try to give up the caffeine--just a little. I do want to make this work with him. And whatever he wants me to do, I will certainly try it. I'll do my best to make it work. And right now, what's important to him is making sure Abbey gets here safely. Well, its important to me too. Unfortunately, without Rob, I just didn't care if Abbey or I either one were here. I know that doesn't make sense, but now that he and I are trying to repair things, its a whole lot easier to want not only Abbey but myself too.

"I know that doesn't make much sense, but it seems my father has been fighting harder for Abbey than I have been able to. Until maybe now. So, I guess that's why I'm on leave. And I guess that's why I'm not fighting it. I do know its for the best. And it really is what not only I need, but Rob and I need it too. I want that time with him."