Feminine Fire

"I haven't heard from her since she left," Khaat said, sipping on her tea. "I just took it, when none of us heard from her that all that nonesense about her thinking we were her family was horsecrap. I had to write her off, Jess. I haven't done well with being hurt since....oh never mind." She wasn't going to fill in the blanks, but ever since Remus died, Khaat hadn't been the same. She couldnt' deal with people leaving her or dying. If they wanted to be family, then they needed to be family. If they walked away, she had a hard time letting them back in, in case they might hurt her again. It was her biggest flaw. Khaat had a huge heart, and if someone hurt her, she was very reluctant to be hurt again.

Kate looked at her. She knew that part of Khaat that had been ripped open when Dolohov murdered Remus just would never heal. It was never something she wanted for her daughter. Robert had never wanted it either.

"Khaat," Kate said soothingly. "Let Remus rest. He never wanted you to hurt that deeply for so many years. He knew all too well what that feels like. Didn't he tell you that when you saw him last?" That brought back the times that she had seen Remus in her sleep, how he had talked with her trying to soothe the ache she carried.

"I think I need some coffee," Khaat said, getting up. "I hope Hope has some. I'll be back." She left the room. Kate sighed.

"Sorry, Jess and Fi," Kate said.

"Who's Remus?" Fi asked.

"Remus was her uncle," Kate said, not sure that this perhaps wasn't the first person who hadn't known who the devil Remus Lupin was. It was a bit weird and almost a bit refreshing.

Jess sighed as she watched Khaat leave " I just thought Cassidy might have been busy what with her fathers funeral and all and I don't think she has forgot us " she said sitting up to look at Kate but she sighed trying to lessen her own anger at Khaat's out burst " if I remember Robert told her to go and sort things out then she could come back, besides I didn't think he wanted two pregnant women around at the same time " she slipped from the lounger and over to the pool diving in again feeling the need to swim off some of her tenshion.

"I think Dean and I should go back home," Fi sighed, very uncomfortable.

"No," Kate said, sipping on her tea leasurely. "Jess apparently does not understand Khaat like she thinks she does. Khaat wasnt' angry, she was hurt. It brought up a lot of her own painful memories. And lately, Jess appears to have a need to stick up for Cassidy when there isn't really any struggle for her to need to stick up for her. Khaat and Jess just arent' getting along in a lot of areas lately. Ignore it. Come on, Fi. Let's take some more iced tea and go get our pedicures. I refuse to let anything spoil my day."

"Alright," Fi said, refilling her glass and Kate's. They got up and went into another room of the salon to start the pedicures with a refreshing herbal foot soak. It wasn't long before Hope brought Khaat in for her pedicure and set her up with a soothing and relaxing herbal foot soak and her cup of coffee. To Khaat's delight, Hope had sent down the street to Sparks for a large paper cup of French Roast. Khaat sat back and just breathed in the aroma, trying to shut away the vivid memories of Remus's body on the day they buried him. Kate could see the pain on Khaat's face. She reached over and took Khaat's hand in hers.

Jess swam a few more lengths and notice them leave she moved to the side of the pool and gave a deep sigh this trip had done nothing but pushed her and khaat further away. she didn't want that to happen yet each time she tried not to it just went wrong. she sighed and watched the water lap around her feet she wanted to join them yet she didn't want to spoil the day as she felt she already had. It was then she saw a gym she moved to it and began working out. soon she felt much better and went in search of the others finding them she moved to sit down.

"Welcome back," Kate said as they attendants set Jess up with a minty herbal foot soak to be refreshing. The attendants then moved to start pedicures on Fiona, Kate and Khaat. "I think you misunderstood, Jess," Kate said. "When we get a chance, I'll explain."

"If you have a thought, say it now," Khaat said, leaning back and shutting her eyes to let them do her pedicure. "Don't do it behind my back."

"Alright, then," Kate said. "Its not about Cassidy for you. Its about abandonment. Its about how you don't want to have anymore friends or staff that pledge devotion to you and then walk out and don't ever contact you again. It reminds you too much of other people that did that to you. Remus perhaps? Rob? Eli? A couple of those kids you were the guardian for that just utterly disappeared? Matt Lestrange maybe--the man you believed would always be there for you enough that you trusted him to name him as Abbey's godfather and then left and never came back? Come on. How long should I make that list?"

"You made your point," Khaat said icily. "Now move on." Her mother had struck a nerve and it hurt.

jess looked at katen and smiled then at Khaat " I don't have any issues or anything to say khaat " she said and lent back " this is nice " she said closing her eyes for a moment " wish I could have this all the time but then my feet and fingrs would go all pruny" she said with a smirk as she opened one eye. She was past all the abandonment issues Khat had and now just wanted to relax.

Khaat actually fell into asleep while they were doing her pedicure. "Well, I am glad to see that," Kate said softly. "Brian told Robert and me that she's been having a lot of nightmares and not sleeping well at all. We'll let her sleep, I think."

"I thought I heard her up in the middle of the night, walking the floors--or someone in that room," Fi said softly. Her room in Ireland had been next to Khaat and Brian's.

"Sounds like Khaat. She paces sometimes. Jess, why don't you ask Khaat to expand the fitness center to include more of this. She has the pool and the hot tub and the massage. It wouildn't be much for her to add the hair and nails. And it would make sense to her. She does believe in whole person wellness."

"Well, and we've been talking about a second location," Hope smiled. "We just didn't know where to put it."

"What do you think, Jess and Fi?"

"I dont' know what you're talking about," Fi said.

"Then we need to certainly show you around the fitness center at St. Mungos," Kate smiled.

Jess chuckled and nodded " yeah it does sound like her " she said as fi said about her pacing " ow sounds a good idea it certainly helps to destress " she said and sighed relaxing in her chair " maybe khaats got the best idea ever " she said and chuckled " I just prefer to relax " she looked at kate and smiled " ok so I have been up tight latly too and the pair of us just don't get along when that hapens but hey it hapenes , time to move on " she said " and yes I have to admit I have clung to jack a bit ..ok alot since coming back though since you changed him into a kitten I feel I don't need him that much any more" she smiled " one reason I came with you all some times hes a little over protective " she said and chuckled.

"Every couple goes through that," Kate said. "That's just the way it goes. Robert found out early on I just wouldn't put up with that. And then I became more clingy the first time Khaat ever got truly very sick. It frightened me more than I ever thought I could be afraid. It took me a little bit to stand on my own again. When Khaat was better, Robert took me on a long weekend to Paris once Khaat was back at school in Hogwarts so that he and I could sightsee at the art museums. He did it deliberately to get me back into my art. Thats when he conjured the big art studio I have and got me back into all my art that I had just set aside for a long time. When I got my life back for myself, thats when I stopped being so afraid. You'll get your confidence back. If turning Jack into a cat did it, then maybe he'd like to be some animal more often," she laughed.

jess laughed and nodded smiling at Kate " he'd love that kate " she said and turned to look at Khaat "she does need this " Jess smiled " She's a good freind kate, ow and boss " jess turned to look at kate smiling at her " and I would not want to work for any one else " she added and sat back being pamperd " I don't think jack will recognize me after this " she said chuckling " humm wonder if I can get a younger man?" she said and shook her head " nope wouldn't want any other than jack, maybe a little less clingy though, and yeah in time it will come " she said knowing kate was right and she respected her for that.