Somewhere in the back of his head where the bloke was unscrewing the screws (that would be him) there was the kink that blew everything out of proportion and turned everything into innuendos. He was working on the other side of the box Elijah was trapped in and he was having a whale of a time, giggling to himself and wondering just what would happen in Barker’s bedroom. The more rational side of his personality was interested in what would unfold too. He knew his body was in a hell of a lot of pain and the little bloke on the other side of the walls wasn’t happy. Neither were the various interpretations of Elijah’s personality and they’d all picked up a screwdriver.
The sex fiend and the scholar weren’t working so well together. Somehow the sex fiend had got it into his head that he wanted to bed himself, or the scholar version of himself, and was now pursuing him. The child that had been left when Alice died was sobbing in the corner of the box, being comforted by the fatherly side. Now, the brains of the operation, Elijah’s intelligence, was watching this unfold and was really beginning to understand them, or, rather, himself. It was bedlam and the sex fiend was really beginning to grope the scholar. There would be a fight in a minute, intelligence was sure of that. The rage that was in the other corner beating the living daylights out of their box was getting angrier by the second. Intelligence really didn’t understand how Elijah dealt with all of these parts of his personality.
“Oh! We’ve got something!”
Oh good god, the neurotic one was shouting, again. There was a loud bang and Intelligence turned around to see Rage take out one wall of their cage with Brute Force flanking him. They’d destroyed one panel of the back which was pretty useless but all of the parts of his personality felt one thing come back into their control, his voice. Intelligence jumped to his feet and clapped his hands together, elated that the idiots were actually doing something useful. He kicked Sex Fiend roughly and glared at the pouting version of Elijah. He pointed to the other side of the room where neurotic was and begrudgingly, sex fiend made his way over there.
“Well done boys but we’ve got a few more to go!” Intelligence shouted.
Everyone went back to work immediately but it didn’t last long. There was a bright flash and the inhabitants of the box grabbed hold of each other in an attempt to stay standing. Intelligence was hauled back onto his feet by Ignorance and he looked up to see the light however dim it was. He was awake again, the body was awake again. Now they had something. They had Elijah’s voice. Intelligence shouted across the room, calling for Wit and Sarcasm. The body was beaten and blooded but the mind was sharp and it was gaining back what it had been robbed of.
“Perhaps we’ll get him to Crucio Elijah,” Greed said from beside Intelligence. Intelligence pursed his lips and hit Greed around the head with the spanner he had although why he had it he wasn’t entirely sure. “It was a suggestion!” He defended himself.
Intelligence narrowed his eyes at the pathetic excuse for a part of Elijah’s personality. It was a midget, barely anything. Selfishness was bigger than greed was. Greed had no standing. “Go back to where you came from, Greed, and get back to work. I want this thing operational.” He ordered. Greed scuttled away and Intelligence looked up. “Wit, Sarcasm...you better do what you do best or I swear-”
The two cut him off with, “Aye-Aye Captain!” and two salutes. Intelligence smiled and looked through the eyes of his body. He stared at Barker from within Elijah’s mind. This man would die even if it was the last thing Intelligence ever ensured.
“Why Barker!” Wit’s speech left Elijah’s mouth and curiously enough that mouth contorted into a smirk. “How I’ve missed you, sweetheart! If you undo my belt then you can finish what you started can’t you? You’ve left me in a sticky situation, lover, and I so desperately want you...I need you.”
That wasn’t strictly true but if Sex Fiend was anything to show for then Elijah was as horny as a dog after a poodle on heat. His voice was oozing with Sarcasm, something Wit’s twin supplied, yet it was wanton at the same time, as if Arousal was hanging about tampering with something. Intelligence crossed his arms over his chest. He needed them to work harder. He needed them to bait Barker and keep the arrogant arse talking. Arrogance...that was it.
“Arrogance! Here now!”
The large version of Elijah’s personality, one that was easily three times the size of a rugby player, got up and jogged over to intelligence. He was about to give intelligence an order when Khaat spoke. Wit and Sarcasm stopped conversing and the whole team stopped working and looked up through Elijah’s eyes to look at the screaming woman that had just called him her son. Even the sobbing, child-version of Elijah was staring up in awe.
“Well shit,” someone spoke up, probably Profanity, from the back, “What do we do now?”
Then, there was bedlam. Everyone was panicking, either crying or running around bumping into each other. Intelligence and Scholar were stood there completely dumbstruck. Intelligence brought his fingers to his mouth and whistled loudly. The personalities stopped what they were doing and turned to look at their leader. Wit and Sarcasm sniffled at the same time and Intelligence looked at Arrogance who’d decided in his infinite wisdom to pass out during their moment of panic.
“I’VE GOT A MOTHER!” Elijah’s abandoned child version screamed his words across the room and he was promptly hit around the back of the head by Brute Force. The boy turned slightly, his eyes rolling back into his head before he fell onto the floor. B!tch, who had remained calm throughout their panic snorted and muttered “Good riddance.”
“It’s okay Khaat,” Elijah spoke and Intelligence turned to find out who had decided to speak. Provoke and Soothe had. “There’s nothing that dirty bastard can do to hurt me. He is a half-blood after all.” Oh no, that was Blood-Snob wherever the bloody hell he was. “He’s half the wizard you and I are...”
“We’re dead!” Neurotic wailed. “We’re deader than that guy that fell off his broom when he got hit by a Bludger in 2010!” Intelligence rolled his eyes, that guy happened to be their sperm donor.