Checking out

Chase stared in shock when suddenly her friend was turned into a slug. "How dare you! How dare you!" She cried out, and jumped forward, grabbing his arm and staring at the bug. "No.. no you can't do that! You can't do that to him! Let him go!" She cried out and watched as he stood up, taking the slug with him. "No... no... he's not dark.. he... no..." She whispered staring up at him as he turned away from her. "No... Angus.. please, don't hate me.. please don't!" She stood up and looked at the slug again. "I just need time okay? I need time.. I need to.. to wake up.. or something... I'm still stuck... up here." She pointed at her head and walked down the hallway after him, watching as he interacted with the other woman and she stopped, and looked down at her feet, unable to believe that he was leaving, but she knew that she had driven him away.

"I'm sorry." She whispered and stood behind him, holding her kitten close to her chin, who was now purring as she held him. "I'm so sorry." She closed her eyes and went back to her bags, picking them up and staring down at them for a long moment. "Why am I so stupid?" She whispered and slid to the floor by her bags, her hands sitting in her lap as Albus balanced on her shoulders. Chase sat for a long time until she could keep her tears back and stood up, finding her hands on her bags, and pushing herself up, moving into the waiting room to wait for Calvin.

Angus had every intention of leaving right then. He heard Chase call after him, and it tore at his heart. He wanted to stay, to try to make some sense to her. But he didn't think he had the power or the skill to make any difference to her.

And then, without warning, his body seemed to betray him. Before he knew what had happened, his knees simply gave out and he fell sideways into the wall. He slumped to the floor. It took him a moment to figure out what had happened. Hannah had been right. He had gone too long without attention. He was bleeding out. His body would no longer hold him because of the blood loss. His vision blurred. His first thoughts were the precious supplies he had come to get. They were needed. What if he didn't get back with them? He reached to the floor to find his wand, but with the blurred vision he couldn't find it.

"Accio," he called tiredly, holding out his hand for his wand. Then he heard a voice beside him.

"Shall I say now that I told you so?" the female voice asked. It was Hannah.

"I have to get that bag back," he said, feeling desperate now. "I have to get home."

"I am quite sure they'd prefer you alive to that bag," he heard her say, lifting the bag from his shouder. "Are you ready for help now?"

"I have to get home," he said softly, laying his head back against the wall. "Tell Chase i don't hate her. I never did. There was no space for hate between all the love."

"Maybe you should tell her yourself after we patch you up," Hannah suggested gently. "That, and you need Brian to teach you how to take a hit and not do this nonsense. Honestly. You aurors are alike."

Chase froze in the hallway, she was heading towards the waiting room, but Angus hadn't made it far before he collapsed on the ground next to the wall. She stood staring at him as the nurse came over, and immediately something clicked in Chase's head. Angus was hurt... her Angus.. her best friend, her big brother. Something inside her head snapped into place, and she came forward to him, bending down beside him. "Please let them help you Angus." She whispered, her hand on his arm, staring at him and blinking at him. "Please.. I'll help you.." She whispered, staring into his eyes for a moment. "I didn't mean to upset you.. and erm... I guess.. I just need sleep... and... time... I need time Angus, can you give me time? Please?" She looked at him and frowned.

"I may seem... wrong to you right now... and.. something isn't right... I miss you guys... I miss... fresh air.. "She said suddenly realizing just how true that was. "Please.. let her fix you up.." She said softly, and frowned, watching as Albus crawled over her shoulders and stared at Angus, purring softly at him instead of hissing. "Please.." She gave him a tiny smile and then looked up at Hannah. "I'm sorry..." She whispered, staring at her, and frowning, knowing there were some tears on her cheeks but she couldn't wipe them away now, she was to weak and upset to even lift her hand, let alone stand up. "Angus.. please... forgive me?" She whispered, though part of her wanted to grab the slug from him and change him back, but she knew she needed to help Angus.

Hannah smiled at Chase confidently. "He'll be alright, Chase. He thinks he's one of those big tough types. Come on, Tough Guy. I'd really like you up off the floor now, please." She got under his shoulder and hoisted him to his feet. He did his best to help. Once he was on his feet, he glanced around for the bag desperately.

"I have it," Hannah told him. "You'll get it back in a few minutes. What's so important in there this time anyway?" She opened the bag, looked in it and closed it quietly. "Ill do the best I can to stop your bleeding as soon as I can. It must be important if you came for that."

"It is," he replied.

"You can come if you like, Chase. It sounds like you know how stubborn he can be," Hannah said. Angus looked at Chase.

"I know," he said to her softly. "You need sleep and food and time with your daughter, all of those things. It'll all work out." His knees started to buckle again, and Hannah sighed and hoisted him up again. She made him move to the treatment room and flopped him down on the bed. She flicked her wand at a chair for Chase to move it close to Angus's bed.

"You might want to sit, Chase. Did you win, at least?" Hannah asked Angus as she got out a basin of water and a cloth to clean him up with.

"Yes," Angus said, unable to hid a slight boyish grin. He loved to fight, he loved to spar, but he loved to win too. "Hey, Chase, the spell wore off the cat. He seems himself now. I was irritated. I'm sorry for that." He reached up and brushed the tears off her face, but one of his fiingers left the slghtest bloody smudge. Hannah began to sponge off the blood and began to heal his wounds with her wand as she went.

"Take all the time you need," Angus said to Chase. "Just so you know, I've missed you since the day you left. You dont need forgiveness," he said, "because we never had a problem between us. Just a misunderstanding. It happens. But if it makes you feel better, I'll forgive you anyway. And I apologize for almost everything--except my bug spell. But I'm sure we can work that out too."

Chase slowly got herself to her feet, and dragged her bags into the room where Hannah had put Angus, and sat down on the chair offered her. Chase frowned and held Albus on her lap, who meowed and purred against her, curling up into a ball and purring as it stared at Angus. Chase didn't say anything until he had said that she was forgiven, and he missed her, and that they could work it out when she was better. Chase stared at her lap and sighed slightly, unable to say anything for a long moment. "I've missed you too Angus.. "She said softly, staring at her lap and swallowing carefully. "I miss you so much.. but.. I can't help but feel like I've missed something... " She said softly, staring at him. "Why ARE you here... Why are you all beaten up... and one big question I don't know if you can answer." Chase looked at him carefully, her eyes slightly glazed over as she pet Albus.

"What's wrong with me Angus? I swear, I wasn't told anything bad.. I don't remember anything bad being said about the Lupins.. but... I swear you're the bad guys... You ruined my life, I... I can barely remember the time I spent with you while I was pregnant... I just remember Calvin, and his lovely smile, it's like I'm finally myself around him... but I think about you.. and it's like you aren't there.. or everything you did had a hidden meaning behind it.. I wasn't TOLD anything bad... I swear it Angus! I swear it.. I just.. I'm so confused, I want to believe you, and yet.. apart of me just wants to run away.. to go to Calvin and hate you.. and run away..but then I see you and I miss you, and Khaat, and the girls, and I just want to go back... go back, and redo everything.." She whispered and then put her hand on her head.

"Angus... I'm so confused, it's like it's all fuzzy, was I.. I drugged? Or put under a spell? I don't recall any spells... and... I feel so weak all the time, and hungry... but I can't eat.. and I just. Want. Calvin." she gasped for air suddenly and sat back in her chair, looking as though she couldn't breathe, and she looked at him knowing she had said to much suddenly, and she felt cold and clammy, and her face got really red.

"Stop and breathe," he said to her gently. "Just breathe. Chase, its a trauma reaction. Our mind will do whatever it needs to do so we can physically survive. Your mind allowed you to believe those things because what you dealt with was beyond you at the time. It was beyond what you could cope with. The sad part about it is that some of the people who do those things know exactly when someone is either right on the verge of cracking or a step beyond. They dont care. When it comes to that bit, Barker is generally pretty good at knowing when to stop. He went over the mark with Khaat, and he may well have gone over the mark with you. After a point of physical trauma, our minds won't take anymore.

"As for where I was, I was rescuing Khaat. You know what Brian and Robert and I do. We rescue wizarding children from an organization that takes them and sells them for money and power. They hate us because we stop them from making money off of our kids. So, they took Khaat, thinking if they could hurt her or scare us that we would lose her, we'd stop fighting for those kids. Well, it just doesnt work that way. We managed to get her, and the kids, and to destroy their largest stronghold. That's where I was. that's what I do. I'm a bodyguard for people who are, well, white lighters. But you knew that much already. I came here for medical supplies for the people with us who were hurt. I can't stand by and do nothing, Chase. And if I'd known you were in the mess you were in, I'd have gotten you out a long time ago."

"Chase," Hannah said, "I remember when you were taken. Angus was the one who rescued your baby from where you hid her. He made sure she was safe and then he hit the streets looking for you. And everyone in your family was turning England upside down looking for you--including everyone they knew. They never went home, never stopped, never slept, didn't rest while you were still missing. They didn't tell you about that because they didn't see it as being nearly as important as it was that, however it happened, you were alive and safe."

"Hannah," Angus reprimanded her. "Chase doesn't need to hear that. Its in the past."

"Hush up," Hannah responded. "You're a mess. She does need to know the truth. She's been in the dark long enough, dont' you think?"

"If she decides, yes," he said. "Hurry up. You're slow, Hannah."

"And you're cranky--as usual," Hannah responded, continuing to work on stopping the bleeding. It wasn't that he was cranky. But he was touchy about anyone giving him credit for things. He didn't usually accept it. It made him uncomfortable. It made Hannah laugh. She went to the cabiinet and got out some bandages. "Some of these are going to seep awhile, Angus. I'm going to wrap them."

"Just stop the leaks, Hannah and let me go," Angus said.

"How the devil are you going to porkey anyplace?" she frowned. "You're liable to end up 180 degress away from where you intended to go, in your condition."

"I will not," he replied rather indignantly. "I have never ever ended up any place I didnt intend to go."

"There's a first for everything," she shrugged. Angus looked at Chase, rolliing his eyes because of Hannah. Hannah had patched him enough that she didn't take much nonsense from him.

"See how she treats me?" Angus looked at Chase.

Chase stared at the ground and listened to them speak, knowing she was about to hyperventilate, and knowing that only his asking her to calm down and breath was she able to. She listened to him speak and calmed herself down as she listened to him speak. She looked up when he said they had rescued Khaat and frowned. "Why did Khaat need rescued?" She asked softly, so soft that she was sure they didn't hear her. but her mind was totally locked on that, she barely registered what they said about getting Katie, and him complaining about getting cleaned up. She stared at her hands for a long moment and then found herself staring at Angus.

"What happened to Khaat Angus?" She whispered, staring at him and frowning. "You said you rescued her.. why did she need to be rescued?" Chase stared at him for a long moment and then leaned forward towards him. "I nearly killed her... and now I have to know that she's okay... I know it's weird.. but I have to know..." Chase stared at him and frowned. "She's the closest thing I have to a mother... she's the closest thing I've EVER had to a mother... my mother.. wasn't the best, but... I miss her.. and.. I want to know she's okay.." She said softly, and picked up Albus, moving her chair forward to sit as close to Angus as she could, gently putting Albus on his bed and staring at him and feeling tears filling her eyes. "I hate this.. I hate this." She suddenly put her hands over her head and pulled her knees to her chest, finding herself looking at Hannah, before looking back at Angus, and knowing her hands were pulling hard on her hair, one hand moving to her throat to scratch at her neck, and knowing her eyes were getting red, and her fingers were scratching hard at her neck, watching Albus crawl along the bed, unaware of her current body movements.

"Chase," Angus said, choosing his words very, very carefully. "You know she loves you. She loves you as much as if she had given birth to you herself. Nothing will ever, ever change that. Nothing. Brian loves you as if he were your real father. Nothing will ever change that either. Kate and Robert will always see themselves as your grandparents.

"So--lets talk first about the good news. The good news is that Brian did finally propose to Khaat A real wedding. For good. And she said yes. Finally," he smiled. "The other good news is that we got her back and she's safe." He took a deep breath. There were no easy words for this.

"The man that took her..." he said. "Barker's boss. His name is Tom Gelding. He's the man responsible for kidnapping all those wizarding children. He makes millions of galleons each year by his entire nasty business. That's a powerful motive for hurting or killing or stopping anyone in your way as best you can. He found a leak in our security today. Khaat was shopping for her wedding gown. Gelding took her at wandpoint. He held her hostage for just a few hours.

"The minute we found out, we went to Paris. We know where Gelding lives. We stormed the house. Brian found Khaat upstairs. She was being held...in chains...in Gelding's bedroom. In his bed...." His words became more carefully chosen now. "There was nothing left of her clothes but some shreds on the floor." He paused for a moment. "She's mostly got some cuts and bruises. She's going to be hurting for awhile. The supplies in my bag...Robert needs them...because...well, Gelding hurt her. And right now she's wondering if she's worthy of any of us bothering with her anymore. She...feels like we would all be better off, including her kids, if none of us had to deal with her anymore.

"I'll make sure she's alright. I promise. Its why I need Hannah to hurry up. I have to get home. I have to get those supplies to Robert. I swear. She's my family too, Chase. I won't let her go. I swear."

"How bad is she, Angus?" Hannah asked gently as she wrapped bandages around his muscular chest.

"Physically, she'll be alright. But..she's...well,..." he felt a loss for words.

"Understandably upset," Hannah finished. Angus nodded. He reached out and took Chase's hand.

"Listen to me," he promised her with a firmness he rarely showed, rarely used. "you will NOT lose your mother. I promise you that. If she sees we stand by her, she'll be alright. I know her. And so do you. There is not a stronger woman anywhere."

Chase knew something was still wrong, but she needed out of there, she needed to run. The sun was dimming... it was so scary, Angus spoke about bad things happening to Khaat, it was her fault.. that's what they had said... it was her fault.. her fault.. they kept saying that to her, they told her that everything bad that happened to Khaat was her fault. She knew she was, it was her fault, and Angus was suddenly grabbing her hand, and Chase stared at him, her eyes wide, her pupils dilated. "She's strong.. it's my fault..." She whispered, and found herself staring at Angus again, and she moved nearer to Angus. "Angus... I just want to go home.. I'm sure I can be okay if I see Calvin... See Katie.. see Khaat..." Chase looked at Hannah, one hand still scratching at her neck, It was such a natural movement now, she couldn't stop herself anymore. It just happened, she scratched her neck until she bled.

Chase suddenly moved forward and grabbed his hand with both of hers. "Angus.... I know.. I know that people.. people think I'm weird.. people think I'm messed up.. but I'm okay... I'm okay... I swear it.. I just... it's so confusing... I'm afraid of everything... I know it's my fault.. it's my fault... I know it is! Angus, It is!"She cried out and suddenly pulled his hand closer to her, knowing that she was wrong, at least hoping that she was wrong. "Angus.... something is wrong with me... I know it is... but I know that I need to get better... Please... tell Khaat that I love her.. and I always have, and I always will.. and tell Brian that I forgive him for punching me.. and I'm so sorry that I yelled at you and made you feel bad.. I'm sorry." She said and stared at him with tears in her eyes.

"Chase," he said very softly. "Stop. Breathe. Slowly. With me. In and then out. With me, alright? Big slow breaths. Here. Give me your other hand. Give me both of them." He took her other hand, the one she was clawing her own neck with. "You're fine. You're alright. Listen to me. It was NOT your fault. Not your fault at all. It was Tom Gelding's fault. Brian took care of him. Brian got him. Gelding is not coming back for a very long time. Gelding's house is gone. There is noplace for them to hold anybody anymore. We burned it down to the ground. Gelding isn't going to hurt anybody for a very, very long time.

"I know if you can see Calvin, you'll feel safer. I know this place is scary for you. I get that. I really do. And I know that if you see Katie, you'll start to get your confidence back. You're not crazy. You're not. You were hurt badly, and it left you with some horrible memories. Chase, if you want to go home, I'll take you home. I promise. I don't think you're weird or messed up. I know you're okay. I'm sure of it. Chase, I have never ever lied to you. Not about anything. You know that. I tell you the truth, even when its hard to hear. You know I do. If I thought you were messed up, I'd say so. You were hurt and scared.

"And when you want to get your confidence back, I'll work with you if you want. I'll train you how to fight so that nobody ever can hurt you again. I'll teach you how to defend yourself so you can protect yourself. So will we all.

"As for Brian and Khaat, you don't owe them an apology. You really don't. They love you so much. So much. You know what? Khaat's made a list of who she wants for godmothers and godfathers for the kids. And you are right on the top of her list for her choice of a godmother. She knows what a good mom you are. And she believes you would be an awesome godmother when you're ready. Don't cry. It'll be alright. And I'm sorry too. Here. I shouldnt' have taken this from you." He got her portkey coin out of his pocket and put it back in her hand. "I'm sorry. This is yours."