Marriage is Murder

"You're supposed to be on your date, remember?" Marcus asked her. He had an idea of his own, though, and sent to Angus for several unbreakable jars and some pumpkin seeds.

Angus didn't understand why Marcus wanted all that, but he sent it over.

"I have to ask," Brian said. "What's that for?"

"What campout is official unless one can catch fireflies?" Marcus asked.

"What?" Brian laughed, frowning. Marcus cast a simple charm on the pumpkin seeds making them glow like fireflies and letting them flutter through the air like fireflies.

The kids were delighted.

"And now all you need to do is teach them to catch them," Khaat said. "Should be simple to teach a bunch of three and four year olds to catch flying pumpkin seeds, right?"

"It does," Brian said to Cassidy.

The kids ate s'mores, caught some of the 'fireflies', and then settled in on the floor in front of the enchanted campout fire to listen to Brian and Marcus tell stories until, one by one, the kids all fell asleep in their bedrolls on the floor.

By the time the kids were asleep, Marcus heard Khaat's stomach growl.

"You didn't eat dinner," Marcus said. "You got busy with the kids. What can I get for you?"

"I got it," she said, picking up a chocolate bar.

"Nutritious," he sighed sarcastically.

"I was thinking of pizza," Brian confessed. "With pineapple and ham and...."

"Sounds good to me," Marcus grinned. "With a beer."

"The beer sounds great!" Khaat said.

"What do I have to do to get you interested in food?"

"Get her un-pregnant," Brian said. "She's never interested in food while she's pregnant."

"Why does that sound backwards?"

"It is."

"I eat," she frowned.

"When did you eat last?"

"Um...this morning," she said.

"And what did you eat, exactly?" Brian asked.

"Michael made some cheesecake Danish..."

"And that says it all. Cheesecake."

"How about I send for some food?" Marcus laughed.

"You don't have to stay with us all night," Brian said.

"Oh, yes I do," Marcus said.

"Thank you," Brian said. "The salads look great, and I"m sure Angus appreciates the help."

Khaat picked up both of the beers, opened them and took a sip from each bottle.

"What are you doing?" Marcus asked.

"Taste testing them. I have to make sure they're still good."

"That is just about the worst excuse I've heard you make," Marcus frowned. "Give me those." He took both bottle from her and handed one to Brian. Then he handed the soda to her.

They ate the salads, and she pulled pieces off one of the cheesecake Danish and ate it slowly. Khaat fell asleep near ten pm on the mattress. By eleven, while Brian had gotten up and had gone just outside to stretch his legs, Abbey had awakened and had crawled over to her mother and had curled up tight against her. Marcus didn't say a word, but as the tiny girl cuddled tight to her mother and went back to sleep, Marcus pulled Khaat's blanket over Abbey too.

"There's not much to enjoy when she's asleep by ten," Brian said. "Actually, its more like spending the evening with Marcus."

"And he's not my type," Marcus said.

"And what exactly is your type?" Brian asked.

"Shapely females," he said. "Really, any female who isn't my wife or who isn't anything remotely like her."

"Khaat said she isn't supposedly the nicest lady."

"Well, Evelyn is not nice. Nor is she a lady in any definition of the word. She's female, but she can even give that a bad name. The only thing decent she's ever done was to give me four great kids."

"Why are you still technically married, then?" Brian asked.

"I haven't had time to divorce her," Marcus shrugged. "And right now, it keeps me from having to marry someone else. Its working out rather well for me right now. Although, I can't imagine any woman being worse."

"She can't be that bad, surely," Brian said.

"She can be," Marcus said. "She has a shrill, annoying voice that sounds like a harpy. And the last I saw her, she was dressed in feathers from head to foot and rather looked like a harpy too. My kids are calling her The Harpy too."

"Then you won't be inviting her here to any family summer outings, I take it," Brian teased.

"Not in this lifetime," Marcus said. "My kids might be a different story, though. Maybe. If that invitation to include my family from time to time still stands."

"When I met her, she was spontaneous, funny, and creative. She was beautiful and fresh. She was unlike anyone I'd ever known. For a very short time, it was really great.

"And then it all went sideways when she realized I was making good money. That brought out a very ugly side of her. She stopped loving me and the kids and started loving my bank account and everything she found it could get her.

"I came home from a mission and found my kids alone in the house and without food or clothing. My oldest boys were maybe 4. Brooke was maybe 2 or 3, and my youngest was under a year. I don't know when I've been so angry.

"I took them to my parents, filed for sole custody of them, blocked her from all our accounts, and they haven't seen her since. Well, Brooke did see her from a distance at Christmas. The only time I hear from Evelyn now is when she runs out of money. She keeps trying to get more out of me, and she gets the same answer every time. As far as I'm concerned, she needs to find some new playboy to hang with."