Cigarette Burns and Humiliation

Brienne had seen worse people than Elijah, and she didn't even get to see his bad side yet. Well, she could assume he hadn't done the stuff she saw. She seen murderers that tortured their victims to insanity before finally ending their lives in the cruelest ways. She saw people vivisect rats in the gutter without anything to dull the animal's suffering. She saw some of these people move up to larger life forms. One even moved up to human subjects, and did it not for study but for entertainment. She'd seen people commit arson after stealing the most precious objects from the house in question. Worse yet, some of these crimes were committed by family. Her mother, her father, her cousins, her aunts and uncles even. Her parents were understandable, they killed people because of the werewolf in them and only when they were werewolves. The same could not be said about her family. They didn't like her altruistic behavior, her goody-two-shoesness. They didn't like her.

She saw Eli falling to the ground. Her eyes widened, and she dove down. She could not imagine how he hurt inside, what turmoil he had gone through. Of course, she couldn't. She didn't know what he gone through, let alone suffer such losses. Well, she lost family members and friends before, including Silas. However, she always managed to bounce back, and was really resilient with the right encouragement. She still had the pain of the loss of Silas, but no matter what threat she made to drink herself to death, Daniel saw through them and instead helped her through. It still hurt though. It would always hurt. Her eyes leaked a steady stream of tears.

"Eli! Elijah! Get up! Please!" She started sobbing loudly. She hugged onto him tightly and cried hard. She thought something was seriously wrong with him, and she didn't want to lose someone she just warmed up to, let alone had a crush on.

(D-d-d-dramaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa Time!)

There was one conciliation, his breathing was regular. That was the only form of reality Elijah seemed to have. He’d never really hallucinated before and he didn’t know why he was doings now. Perhaps time was finally catching up with him but Elijah wished he could have been on his own for that, not in the presence of other people that would look at him oddly afterwards.

The hallucinations didn’t make sense to him. They were everything before and that hurt him more than the thought of having to once again relive her death. No they were the days before when they were laughing and joking around without a care in the world. He could see himself inking a pattern onto Alice’s skin around her eye. The slide changed and he saw himself throwing her into the pond that was in the grounds of the manor. The slide changed again and the scenarios began to speed up, their laughter ringing in his ears.

If he’d thought he’d hit rock bottom back then, then he was sorely mistaken. This was rock bottom. He’d hit the Earth’s crust. He could feel the heat radiating off of it and Alice’s laughter in his ears. But slowly, that laughter died away and it was replaced with sobs that sounded real and more importantly, alive. The blurred slides changed and flew out of his consciousness, returning to their places in his memory. The darkness around him slowly began to lighten and he returned to reality, to his reality.

The sobs got louder and Elijah found himself on the cold tiled floor of St. Mungo’s with Brienne’s arms around him. Hesitantly, Elijah raised his arm and he patted her awkwardly on the back. She must have been crying on his account but he couldn’t remember how he ended up on the floor or why he was in St. Mungo’s. But one look at the ruined skin on his hand reminded him. He cringed and took the hand away from her. He just allowed himself to be hugged. He didn’t know what else he was supposed to do but he’d managed to embarrass himself twice already and he was wondering if that embarrassment would cease.

Brienne clung to Elijah until she saw that he was alive and not suffering from some life threatening condition. She stroked his hair and stared into his eyes. The hazel in her own seemed to darken with her shadow, her pupils dilated. She looked like a scared and sad puppy dog that had suffered indescribable acts of cruelty in the hands of the people it trusted so much in the short span of its life. Really, the pain of the seventeen years of her life hadn't vanished, it was still there. She didn't know it. All the losses of family and friends, the torment she went through at the hands of her family, and the acts that were committed against innocents at the hands of her family. It was readable in the pupils of her eyes, perhaps maybe tangible if only the cornea wasn't there.

"Are you okay, Eli?" She managed to say.

Just because he was aware of his surroundings didn’t mean he wanted to be a part of them. Elijah just wanted to fall through into the floor. He didn’t want to know about Jenny-over-by-the-water-cooler’s obsession with Quidditch players. He didn’t want to hear the questions to be shot at him. Was he okay? Of course he wasn’t! He was trying to come up with answers to these stupid questions and he was finding that he could probably get them out with a convincing edge to them.

Gone was the fatigue. The feline was just more het up than usual and he needed some time to himself. As much as he wanted to go and find Robert’s office and break into the bottle of Firewhisky Elijah knew the man had there, he knew it wasn’t fair. Being drunk and disorderly wouldn’t help the state he was in but he needed a cigarette. He needed to calm down and the irony of it was that he needed something that had caused him to be in the hospital in the first place. Well technically it was Dan’s fingers but he didn’t need them at the moment.

Elijah’s eyes went to Brienne and he bit the inside of his cheek before answering, “Fine.” He gripped whatever sturdy structure was behind him and pulled himself back onto his feet. “I think I just need some air. Excuse me...”

As quickly as his legs could carry him, Elijah left the room and pushed his way through the crowded lobby in an attempt to find the front doors. He pushed himself between two gossiping women and threw himself at the doors. They fell against his wait and let him out onto the street. The air had cooled considerably now and the chill went right through him, clearing his mind. The Bulgarian leaned against the wall of the hospital and slid down the side onto the pavement. With shaky hands he retrieved a cigarette and lit it, the red glow being the only indication of someone being there.

Brienne followed Eli, she needed to convince him to get back and go to the room that he had been admitted to. Daniel followed her close behind.

"Elijah! Wait! We need to tell you something important!"

Brienne was nearly out of breath when she saw the red glow of the cigarette.

"Eli, we got a room for you in there. Rather, Jen did. She got you a room upstairs in the hospital, someone is going to treat your burn and make it all better. After you finish your smoke, please come back". It wasn't Brienne talking, she was kinda gutless at this point, and didn't want to anger Eli. It was Daniel, his soft, pleading voice became softer and a bit choked out by tears each word spoken.

Brienne just stared at Eli, wide eyed.

As the nicotine entered Elijah’s system he slumped further against the wall and let his eyes slide shut. He felt at peace in the cold. It balanced out the unholy heat that was wracking his body and keeping everything at an extreme heat, one he couldn’t think clearly in. Elijah rolled his neck around in an attempt to get the kinks out by himself but he didn’t have much luck with it so gave up and rested his head back against the bricks.

His peace was cut short though when he heard footsteps. He assumed it was Brienne or Daniel or both of them. He would have put money on both of them. He didn’t know why they cared. Perhaps it was just because he was going to help Daniel out so they felt that they had to do something for him in return. Elijah didn’t care if they felt obligated to do something or not. He just wondered why they cared; unless of course they were the type of people that cared unconditionally about others. That was a trait that would get them in trouble.

Elijah ran a hand through his hair and listened to Daniel. Treatment would be fun no doubt. Elijah took the cigarette from his mouth and held it near his hand so he could see exactly what had happened to it. The skin on his fingers wasn’t just gone but also some on the back of his hand. A big ark of skin had disappeared and Elijah wasn’t exactly sure what he was supposed to do about it apart from get treatment but what could they do for him?

Elijah flicked the cigarette away and drew his legs up to his chest. He dropped his forehead onto his knees and closed his eyes, forcing the tears that were threatening to fall to keep behind his eyelids. He was overwhelmed. There was just too much going on in his head. Elijah sighed shakily and straightened himself up. He got to his feet and rubbed his eyes with the cuff of his blazer and he took the grey jacket off. He threw it over his arm and rubbed his face with his hands.

He met Daniel’s gaze from the shadows and stepped lightly into the glow coming from the windows. Elijah ran a hand through his hair and cleared his throat. “I suppose we better find that room then.” He mumbled.

Brienne started walking, as did Daniel. Both of them glanced at each other then at Eli. Then both of them started whispering at each other.

"You know, I don't want this guy to end up dead or suffering. It'd be like another Silas, though Silas was older and died in a totally different manner. Y'know, DJ? It's like, equal to someone you've known for a while and loved. Eli, though I haven't known him a long time, he's helpful. Silas was helpful too, he also seemed to care about us. He made sure we were okay, but we failed him in the same regard. Eli, though, he's...he reminds me of Silas. He seemed like he wanted you to succeed". Brienne, at that point, was rambling.

"I seriously think you should admit your feelings. You're rambling, making yourself look like a retard or a fan girl. Just put them feelings to rest" Daniel scowled.

"Remember in the past how things worked out when I admitted my feelings to a man? Remember how that worked out for me?" Brienne facepalmed. "Just think of yourself, I tried with you, and what happened? You turn out to be gay."

"I'm pretty sure he's not.."

"So? It won't be any different. Whatever."

"Suit yourself."

"Well, anyway, DJ. Eli seems like a tortured soul. What's one tortured soul to another? That's why we should continue to be kind to him. Tortured souls helping each other out."

Most of the conversation was hushed, only withing earshot of the two talking. They looked back at Eli. The hospital was no longer busy, people had cleared out. Apparently, the other rooms in the ER had been taking in and treating patients at a quicker rate while the whole mess happened.

Robert had duty in the trauma ward that day. He had finished with some silly young lad who had accidently blown his arm off because he was mixing a couple of illegal potions together just to see what they would do. It had been a difficult surgery, but Robert had saved the boy's arm. It was going to be a lengthy recovery, though.

And as he returned, he saw Eli coming in. And he looked like he needed sorting out in more ways than one. He walked over to the nurses station and picked up Eli's chart and then went over to Eli. "I think we have a bit of work to do, don't we?" he asked him quietly. Eli looked like he was overwhelmed, out of sorts, and completely out of patience. Not to mention, Robert clearly saw Eli was not himself. He felt certain he could put things right again, but he felt things would go better if he could see Eli alone without his entourage for just a few moments.

"Would you like to come with me? Alone?" he asked him.

If looking back at someone wasn’t an indication that you were talking about them then Elijah didn’t know what was. Perhaps glaring was another one but Brienne wasn’t glaring. She just looked like a worried mother and another worried mother was the last thing in the world Elijah needed. Jenifer was suffocating enough on her own when it suited; another woman trying to ‘look after’ him wasn’t what he wanted. Just the whole being looked after thing freaked Elijah out. It meant that he was handing over his control and he couldn’t do that, not for Jen, not for anyone.

So, the Bulgarian tuned his companions out. He didn’t want to listen to them fret anymore than anyone else in the room. He did however want to listen to Josie Smith tell her friend about catching her husband cheating on her with her sister but then one look at Josie made Elijah wonder why anyone would marry her in the first place unless she was loaded. He shook his head, wondering why he even cared, and continued to follow Brienne and Daniel.

Jen was still there but he noted some other familiar faces gathered around a circular table. He saw Rob and the men he assumed were Pierre, Christophe and David but not exactly in that order. Elijah stopped where he was and looked at the armchair that had its back to him. He saw a mop of black hair pop up and he met his daughter’s gaze. From what he could see she was decked out in footie pyjamas and Christophe had put a pale pink bow around her head to add to the overall cuteness of the look.

Fauve mouthed “Papa” at him and Elijah made to go over to her but he was stopped short when he heard Robert’s voice. Elijah’s face fell slightly and his weary eyes flicked to Robert. He swallowed and nodded. “Yeah,” He struggled out, his voice hoarse. “That would probably be a good idea..”

"This way," he told Eli gently. He led him to a treatment room, steering him away from everyone else, and closed the door behind them. "Sit," he told Eli, motioning for him to sit. He took Eli's hand in his. The burn was a nasty thing, but certainly repairable. And it didn't help that several other incompetents had been at it. If they were any of his healers, he was going to put them in a bug jar for sure. If they were interns, well, he might consider a second chance. But a second offense was a justifiable conviction to a bug jar as far as Robert was concerned.

Right now, he was more concerned with Eli's flat affect, the rather disconnected look in his eyes. Almost dissociative. Something had caused the normally very resilient young man to come apart--to have a severe stress reaction, something of an anxiety attack. He looked deeply at Eli for a moment, studying. He would get nothing out of him like this. Not anything useful anyway. He had to get him back to himself first. He went to the cabinet and poured a dose of a potion. Unfortunately, this one always tasted like firewhiskey. It was unfortunate, but if he knew Eli, that would hardly be a deterrent.

"Here," Robert said to Eli, handing him the glass. "Drink. Then we'll talk in a moment or two."