the princess of squalor and the prince of opportunity

Lily did not have to wait long, considering, and the door was thrown open, leaving her to stare at her light-counterpart. Neither spoke, because neither knew what to say. There friendship was strange - they really had never spent time together outside of the hospital wing, had bonded under very specific conditions and circumstances. And yet, each girl had left the school year considering the other to be the only true friend they had managed to obtain at Hogwarts.

It was almost how embarrassing how important their time spent together had been.

"Hello," Lily responded back, her voice low from lack of use. She allowed a twitch in her lips, her eyes crinkling slightly in kindness, though a full fledged smile was still an elusive thing.

She stepped inside and unzipped her jacket, though she left it hanging from her shoulders. She glanced around, taking in the entryway. Her head turned towards Kit at the question and she offered another attempt at a smile. "Okay. I've been okay. How about you? How have you been holding up?"

Lily didn't necessarily look very happy, but then, Katherine wasn't really the most observant of young ladies. She had gotten better at it during her time in and out of the Hospital Wing, but she was also something of an idealist, and wanted to believe that her friend was happy. So she didn't want to see it, couldn't see it.

When the question was turned around on her, Kit was actually rather pleased to be able to say the words.

"I'm getting better, I think."

It was wishful thinking, and she had no real way of knowing for sure. But things were looking up over the past week and a half, and it made her happy despite the inevitability of Katherine going a little stir crazy.

"Lately, anyway, I've been almost good. But Mes is quite paranoid and won't let me go out anywhere. Otherwise maybe I would've stopped by to see you sooner," Katherine said, passing her friend a smile as she walked over to the couch. Snacks and tea had been set out by her brother, the latter kept under a warming charm just in case.

Lily followed Katherine, listening patiently, her eyes focused on a spot ahead of her, her face placid and unreadable. Someone who might have known him very well, perhaps Scorpius or even the Dyllan woman, might have spotted a bit of @Albus Potter in Lily's unpracticed gaze, following an instinct that came naturally after years and years of observing successful practice of The Mask. It was not that she did not trust Kit enough to show her who she was - she didn't trust who she was enough not to scare Kit off.

Lily sat as they reached the couch, her mind naturally taking stock of entrances and exits, taking in the refreshments and layout, once again appraising her friend's slight figure, trying to gauge how much had changed.

"I guess that's what big brothers are for," Lily said with a smile, her own cynical mind adding the I wouldn't know to the end of it. Though it wasn't something she held against Kit. Kit needed her brothers, and if anyone deserved a functioning sibling relationship, it was the blonde. "I'm really glad he helped arrange this. I've been wondering how you've been since... everything." She shook her head. They had never really had a chance to talk about the party gone wrong, had a chance to discuss why she was so messed up. She widened her eyes a bit, as though stretching out the bad memories and shaking them loose, trying again for another smile. "I've missed just... hanging out and reading and doing nothing with you. Nothing is always better with company."

A few weeks later...


Mesut was sloppily, embarrassingly drunk. And, to be fair, that level of drunkenness was likely less that most, because he so rarely allowed himself to get drunk in the first place. So the idea that he had just sent a patronus to Lily Potter and invited her over was seeming pretty ridiculous. He imagined that his message to her must sound messy and slurred, but it wasn't strictly true. She would almost undoubtedly catch the difference, though, between his usual self and this new Avery.

She wanted to know about Katherine, which was fair, and which he should have told her straight away. In truth, there were few other people he saw any use in mentioning it to. But his own stress levels were impressively high, so he hadn't quite gotten around to it.

But he had to. She deserved to know. So he sat at his kitchen table, glass of ice water set in front of him in hopes that he would wake up with less of a headache. And, perhaps he would sober up by the time she was able to come by, or at least by the time she left.

That would certainly be preferable.

He did hope that the boys he had left to talk to her wouldn't be too annoyed with him for ditching them. Or, equally, wouldn't make assumptions and use her to further their crazy ideas regarding Celia. She didn't deserve something like that, although he wasn't sure she would notice, nontheless care.

His forehead settled into one hand and he took a sip of his drink, pretending to read through the morning's Prophet.

Lily had been considering Christian's insane plan with Alice Longbottom, and how Ace actually thought she could do something to help with Ilvermorny. The past few weeks had been weighing heavily on Lily, but especially since the night when she had promised Apollo she would make up all the hurt she had caused. At night, she sat awake, alone, with confused thoughts, half-baked plans, and even more complicated emotions flitting in and out of her skull, with no resolute decision or reconciliation to follow.

That was why she started to really miss Kit. And to become unsettled when there was no response. And when a letter was returned unopened in the days after her lunch with the twins, she decided she couldn't just wait around.

A letter was drafted to Mesut in under two minutes, hands moving quickly and dispatching the letter off with haste.

She had settled in to figure out what was to be done for dinner when the strange patronus message arrived. Confused, but not about to give more cause for Mesut to disapprove of her, she pulled on a cardigan and immediately left her apartment.

She knocked once she reached the door, plucking the cardigan closer around her. She really hoped Mesut called her in to say all of her owls had arrived but fallen ill...

Mesut didn't fully understand why Lily felt like she had to knock upon arriving, but then, he supposed he had never clarified or given her an official go-ahead to just floo or apparate in. Somehow, he knew that it had to be her, without getting up and checking. Who else would be coming over? One of the boys, arguably, but they were all pretty sloshed by that point, weren't they? So it probably wasn't the wisest decision to apparate anywhere until they had gotten something steadying in their system.

Indeed, rather than getting up to see, Mesut picked up his wand and flicked it towards the door, unlocking it and letting it fall open.

At first, he didn't say anything. Part of him wanted to see the sort of reaction she would have to the way he was bent over the table, wearing what was bizarrely like beach wear for a man sitting in a low-lighted kitchen by himself. It was, in fact, what he had worn on the day out, and he had been too lazy to change. Perhaps he should have done so before telling her she could come over if she wanted to know what was going on.

He took a long drink, actually wishing that it was still alcohol that ran down the back of his throat, and lifted his head enough to glance towards his cabinet where the stuff was hiding.

Then, he turned his head to stare at Lily in the doorway, half-seeing her but almost daring her to come over and sit down with him.

"Katherine is gone," he said finally, frowning somehow with the whole of his body. His shoulders deflated that much more, and he let out a ragged sigh. His words were drawn out a bit, but he was managing to keep it together at least a little. He still wanted that drink, though.

When he repeated it, he shrugged a bit, like it was just a fact now and couldn't be helped. And his gaze lifted to hers, his blue eyes just hazy and unfocused enough to be obvious despite his nearly-normal speech. "She's gone. I should have told you."

The door cracked open, but there was no one there. Lily blinked and then felt something foreboding grip her. Her mind flashed to a night when she opened up her own door to see no one there. All was fine. She turned back around to see the face of Roxanne Weasley, and when she turned to run, two men had her, and something was shoved down her throat and-

Her wand was out and her breathing was shallow in her throat as she took an exploratory step inside. And another. She quietly closed the door behind her and edged further inside.

Mesut was there. And he looked a right mess.

She stared around, looking for signs of a struggle, but she had enough experience to realize that Mesut was in no danger. She knew exactly what he was. She dropped her wand arm.

"Are you drunk?"

They spoke at the same time, and she tried to cling to this, the fact that her own words must have somehow transformed to have that horrible meaning that was now beginning to sink over her. No, no, he hadn't said that, he hadn't...

"She's gone."

Her eyes closed and silence gripped her, time slowing down as the world pressed inward. The air was caught in her throat else she would have began plotting aloud immediately, would have demanded further explanation.

Her eyes flicked open.

"I see you've already come up with a foolproof plan. Taking the night off, it seems."

She knew it wasn't fair. She had failed Kit for a year while poisons pumped in and out of her own body. But she was a stupid, depressed kid with no family that gave a shit. Mesut was sort of his sister's guardian! How could he so apparently not care?!

But she didn't feel like being fair. She felt like saving Kit.

She rolled her eyes and pushed up her sleeves, flicking her wrist to free her wand. "Whatever. You stay here. I'll go find her." She turned for the door.

Ah. So she knew. It wasn't really worth responding to that when it looked like she was trying to take in everything he was saying. And that was fair. He wasn't saying much, but it was heavy stuff, that.

He understood perfectly.

He rolled his eyes at her snark, deciding that she had a right to be angry, and that it would be in his best interest - not to mention better for that whole headache thing - if he let her get it out of her system. Still, he stood because she wouldn't sit, and the next thing he knew, she was leaving again without hearing the whole story.

A heartbeat later, he had landed in his own doorway, wand in hand and glowering at her as he blocked the way out.

"You can't just find her, Lily. People have been trying to find her for days. Better, and more skilled, individuals than you or I have been searching for that damned train and found nothing. Absolutely nothing that you do, or I do, will make any difference at this point since there's nowhere to begin. So yes. I'm drunk. It may not have been my idea, but I went along with it, and now I'm here, trying to tell you that my baby sister is gone but she was dying anyway, and now there's nothing we can do.

"So you can look down your ridiculously hypocritical nose at me, or run off or do whatever it is you want to do. But I'm going to have another drink."

With that, he stepped to the side, gestured sarcastically towards the door and turned back to his kitchen, aiming for that cabinet.

And suddenly he was barring her way. For all of the subtle fears she had towards the world, she was not threatened by Mesut. There was a certain goodness in him, a goodness that unsettled her and kept her distant, and it was that very quality that made her certain he would not do anything to actually harm her. He had had his chance. He had seen her low and vulnerable. And yet he had called upon her to do better.

Besides, her wand was raised too. And she wasn't drunk.

She would not back down. No, she was finally at a point in her life where she was tired of letting good things slip through her fingers, sick of throwing away the good things in her life when she finally secured them. She wasn't abandoning the Zabinis. She was going to reacquaint with Teddy and Casey. And she sure as well was not going to just forget about Kit.

But one word out of Mes' mouth was enough to slacken the fierce expression on her face, drooping into something uncertain. Because as much as they had relied upon each other, as bound together as they were by their separate illness, Kit had never delved much into her condition.

So when Mesut walked away, Lily could only repeat this word, this horrible word that changed everything.

Faintly she repeated, "Dying?"

[ooc: that moment when you realize Mes is a Death Eater and could help with that plot idea.]


Mesut's feet slowed as he approached the cabinet, finally halting as her question sunk in. Kit hadn't told her. He hadn't meant to tell her, either. But now it was out there and he didn't know what to do. He couldn't think of anything to say, either, so he just stood there, back to her, in silence. She wasn't going to cry was she? That would really get him worked up.

Finally, he turned around on his heel until he eventually made it around and could look at her again.

"She didn't say anything," he concluded, voice low. Swallowing hard, he glanced away for a moment but forced himself to try and focus. "Nobody knows what's wrong. It isn't getting better, even if she tells herself it is. And now she's just disappeared and there are no big brothers there to help her, even if only one of us would," he grumbled, knowing even as he spoke that he was letting too much show.

Mesut shook his head, instantly regretted it, and ended up leaning against the counter to settle himself. "Point is, we can't fix it if she is not here. So she may not come back at all."

His hand reached up blindly, pulling open the cabinet open. He was internally quite proud to find that he had chosen the correct one. "So. For now, I'm going to see what proper drunk feels like. Because this doesn't seem to count. Do you want a drink, too?"