Hitame looked down at her feet as Lucca spoke. He was willing to get his friends to help him look for her sister. He was willing to let them and himself get hurt just to find Naomi. All because she was the most important person in her life. If she had to speak honestly, Naomi was the whole reason she hadn't given up on life yet. So many things had happened to her and she could have died any of those times, just to keep the pain away, but she didn't. She lived, and all the while, even if she was in pain or on the brink of death, it was the thought of Naomi being alone without her that gave her strength to keep living.
The time she was tortured by Felix Barker, she almost died. No. She did die. She died for a few moments before he brought her back to life to continue torturing her. But while she was gone, she seemed to relive her life as a little girl. With Naomi by her side and their adoptive parents there too, before they were killed. They were all together and happy. After their parents died, Naomi was lost and Hitame had to figure out how to get her to move on without harming her. She didn't want Naomi to have that lost and confused feeling again, if she was gone.
It was the only reason she had survived Felix's torturing a second time. She still had the scars from where he had marked her like she was his toy.
"I'll never join them Lucca. I almost did once though, I won't lie. But it was for a different reason. It was because of my brother. They wanted him too, but they told me that if I joined, they wouldn't take him. We both managed to get out of it though. Sometimes I feel like Xem will join them.. Like he has some hidden darkness within him that will persuade him to join them somehow." she admitted. That was another thing that had her worried now. Naomi and Xem, one of them could end up as a Dark Follower. She didn't want either of them to join them.
"I think it's enough pain for him that I broke up with him Lucca. There's no point in causing him needless pain... for now." she told the older boy softly, finally looking up at him. He kept saying that he would have preferred to have her life and vice versa but Hitame didn't know what to tell him. His life was easier than hers, that was true, but she didn't want him to have her life. It was too much for anyone, even him, to handle. "I wouldn't wish my life on anyone else.." she admitted softly.