new beginnings and new love.

Cassidy shook her head again as he lay with her on the bed " no I like aperating with you besides Robert said i should do it more often so I stop being so shaky when I do " she said she lay her ehad on his chest and sighed " this is wonderful " she said and looked at him " your wonderful clay" she said and moved to kiss him moving she sat up on him her hands resting on his chest . Taking his hands she rested them on her tummy which even now was showing her baby bump and she smiled " she dose know your voice I feel a flutter each time you speack softly though that might be because it sends my hearf fluttering too" She said and sighed leting him feel it too as she smiled " see she moved" she said smiling " Clay im not scared to be a mother anymore I can't wait now to hold our child" .

Clayton smiled up at her "can you ever just relax?" he whispered quietly with a slight chuckle. he leaned up and kissed her on hand resting on the back of her neck. "your so beautiful," he said tears in his eyes. she was so happy but he was so worried he was going to fail her and their child. he hoped that he didn't and couldn't' wait to hold their child in his arms. he hoped it was a little girl who he could spoil so much she would think she was a princess. then he hoped it was a boy he could play ball with in the back yard like his father did before he began to drink.

cassidy smiled " I guess not " she said then lent down again and just lay on him " not with out you around I can't " she sighed " if its agirl would you teach her to play ball because i get the feeling she will be a tomboy , I wasn't a girly girl when I was younger " she said and yawned slightly her arms wrapped around him as she lay on him his body and smell seming to lul her into sleep as she lay on him " coz....."yawn"...I think she would love that and ..."Yawn"..so would you" she finished as she drifted off to sleep on top of him " I love you clay so much" were her final words as she snuggled against him.

"If that's what she wants," Clayton whispered as she smoothed her hair down with his hand he smiled as she fell asleep and snuggled against her. "I love you too," he murmured to her. he lay there listening to her sleep for a while then careful got up so he didn't wake her. he had shrunk his guitar so it would fit into the suit case and he was going to go get it out so he could play for her later. once his guitar was normal size again he went to take a shower. he was planing on taking her out to eat at a really fancy restaurant he knew of from past business trips to France and other parts of Europe

Cassidy slept long and deep she really needed the rest she woke to find him gon but she heard the shower strangly her tummy didn't seem to want to make her throw up and she moved from the bed to the bathroom stripping down as she went she paused to look at her self her tummy now the size of a small football she rubbed it and smiled moving to the shower cubical she stepped in behind clay her hads picking up the soap and she began to wash him. " have you seen how big I look now " she said turning side on so he would see she smiled and rubbed her tummy gently. she faced him and kissed him " thank you clay I feel so much better now , that sleep was just what I needed, so whats for lunch? " she asked smiling.

"Yes I have," he whispered moving to kiss her lightly on the forehead, "and you get more beautiful every day." he smiled down at her then kissed her on the lips. he smiled as she asked what was for lunch. "That is your choice but i have something very special planed for dinner, but i can't tell you any more than that right now." he helped her wash her hair careful not to pull on it any and hurt her. "I love you," he whispered in her ear "I love you so much." she knew he was the kind that left but only started that after his crappy childhood and only after his mother killed his father then here self.

Cassidy smiled as he said he loved her but also at what he said that he had a suprise planned for dinner " ok I won't ask , but i could go for some girkins and ice cream?" she said and smiled " hey blame him or her " she said and pointed to her tummy chukaling.Cassidy sighed loving how his hands felt on her hair and hear him say he loved her she knew he did wirth each day that passed that he staid with her. " Clay we love you to" she said and turned to face him tking the sponge she washed his chest lightly " I am greatful for each day you stay with me , I can only imagine how hard it is for you and how scared you feel but don't be, your not your father" she said holding him close to her now she could feel the bump inbetween them and she sighed.

Clayton smiled down at cassidy "what ever you want," he whispered kissing her on the forehead. "what ever our child wants," he said quietly, "what do you want to name them?" he asked as he washed her hair for her then she turned to face him and wash his chest. quietly he put his arms around her and held her tight lifting her off the floor for a minute then setting her back. "I know you do, and i want the best for you. sometimes I'm afraid I'm not the best for you. Someone like Steven is the best one for you not me," he whispered in her ear as he held her close to him.

Cassidy looked up at him and shook her had her hand caressed his cheek " clay I married you not steven besides I think dalilah will be rather annoyed if i took him from her" she said " I love you Clay,not steven, I want to be with you for the rest of my life " she moved to kiss him " I am here with you, " she wondered why he had said that to her all she wanted was to be in his arm and be with him threw what ever life threw at them.

"You should be with someone you aren't always worried that when you wake up in the morning that they will be gone," he whispered his hand resting on top of hers "You need someone you can depend on. that's not me." thought he believed this he wasn't ready to give her nor their child up. "someone who will always be there no mater what. not someone who runs when things get to tough." he held her close to him "I don't want to hurt you ever" he whispered kissing her neck.