Smudges

Hogsmeade was a nice reminder that the school year was fast approaching. But Hogsmeade was also a useful place to go when hiding from your mother. That was exactly what Elijah was doing but not only was he hiding from his mother in a pub but he was hiding from her in a completely different country. Bulgaria was hardly close to the UK but it was in Europe. She’d come looking for him soon enough, hopefully not within the next couple of hours though. Elijah wanted to disappear for a few hours. She was driving him absolutely bonkers and he wanted a bit of time to himself. The solitude would definitely be welcomed and as he wandered through Hogsmeade, he realised how little the town was visited during the summer. Obviously only the residents took advantage of the shops and pubs that resided in the small village.

Elijah opened the door of the Three Broomsticks and stepped inside. He wandered over to the bar and ordered a pint of some alcoholic beverage that had a weird taste to it. Whatever it was, Elijah had become quite partial to it although only by accident. He paid the barmaid and picked up the glass. He wandered over to one of the booths and slipped down into the plus seats. He put his pint down on the table and put his shoulder bag on the seat beside him. He slid his jacket off and put it beside the bag before rifling through it and taking his sketch book out. He turned the pages and put it on the table. He picked his pencil up out of the dip between the pages and absent-mindedly beginning to draw with his left hand, tracing the rim of the glass with the index finger of his right hand.

Aurora was just visiting for the end of the summer. Unlike everyone else, Aurora didnt like going to parties and so all she had to do was visit old places that she usually visited during the school year. Hogsmede wasnt exactly the same as she had remembered but since she barely came here anyways she wouldnt know what to expect.

When Aurora decided to walk into the three broomsticks to get a drink, it was about 12:30. Aurora got her a butter beer and looked around. As she thought, barely anyone was in this place so it was exactly how she liked it, quiet.

Aurora sat in an empty pud at the edge of the room and drank a bit of her butterbeer. Oh how relaxing it was that she knew she wouldnt be getting really super shy today. It was soo so sooo peaceful to be getting some quiet time with barely anyone around.

Tapping his pencil against the paper, Elijah thought carefully about what he wanted to see appear on the paper. Alice was the first name that came to his mind. It was getting close to ...that day. Another week or so and he’d confine himself to his room like he did every year as the grief stuck him in both consciousness and unconsciousness. The former only happened on that one day but he had no control over the latter. From what he could tell it happened every single night. But he didn’t thrash around. He had been told that he just cried. For the string of lovers he had in the past never seemed to notice. Maybe they were just that dense or perhaps with them, to feel someone close to him and have the warmth of another body wrapped around him, it wasn’t as bad. The presence of another human being was incredibly important if Elijah was going to sleep and not wake up with his cheeks streaked with tears. He missed Alice more and more every day but no one could cure that sense of loss.

As if by magic, as his thoughts raced he began to draw and her face began to make its way onto the page. Her yellow hair looked as soft as he remembered it being the little splatter of freckles across her nose and cheeks also appeared. Alice had been nine, nine when he’d lost her. It had been six years and he still remembered. No one else knew, only the little Muggle boys but her face had probably left their memories a long time ago. But she wouldn’t leave him. He couldn’t move on, neither of them could because he was haunted by her memory. Everything about her from her hair colour to her name. His best friend...reduced to absolute nothing by something inferior to her.

Out of pure anger, Elijah’s hand slammed against the wooden table and he jumped. He’d made the move involuntarily. He hadn’t even known he’d done it. Pushing his sketchbook away from him, Elijah dropped the pencil and put his arms on the table. He bit down hard on his lip to prevent sobs from leaving his mouth and he rested his head against his forearms, his body shaking as the silent sobs wracked his frame. Why did this always happen? It showed how close it was to the anniversary...to the waking reminder. The grief was seeping into his consciousness but it had never been as strong as it had been now. He had a week yet already things were getting difficult for him to deal with.

Aurora heard alot of taps onto paper. She reconised the sopund anywhere since she had loved to draw but never knew what she wanted to draw. What was the person over there wanting to draw? She wondered why he was over there alone and not with his friends. Most people had friends to hang out with but apperantly he didnt wanna hang out with them. Why was this? she didnt know.

After a while of thinking about people hanging with their friends, Aurora started thinking of other things. She got so bored that she pulled out a pen and a small note pad and started drawing a small picture of a house in a thunger storm. She always thought of this storm, it she didnt remember it since she was a baby when it happened but that storm reminded her of the day her parents died. She was so young, so so young when they died and she always drew storms. With school comming, she wondered what her parents would think and what she would be doing with them if they were still alive she wondered if she would have a little brother or......

Her thoughts were caught short by the sound of the boy banging his hand against the table. What was wrong with him? She quickly put away her pen and drawing of a storm, picked up her butterbeer, and walked over to the boy. "Are you alright.. You slammed your hand on the table.. why?" She asked him curriously.

As if by magic, or perhaps just by his mind taunting him, Alice’s face, her smile, her laughter, her excitement and her tears – it all began to flash beneath his eyelids and Elijah felt salty tears seep out onto his cheeks. Then, when the final moments came onto the ‘screen’ the climax of the film, Elijah felt the sobs begin to wrack his frame. He looked small, vulnerable, terrified. But astonishingly enough, as he cried his hand kept working as if it wasn’t attacked to his arm at all. Alice was being created once again but she didn’t look the same. Of course she didn’t. His memory of her was vague at best but he’d never forget her die. He’d never forget watching the bastard that killed her die either. He relished in the joy of avenging his friend. It had been an accident but not one he’d lost sleep over. Accidental magic that killed a man that deserved to die. Elijah saw no fault in it. Secrets were dark parts of him, especially this one. To have his best friend ripped from his side and murdered before him...he couldn’t imagine any more pain than that.

The sobs began to subside but not quickly enough. A voice broke through the pattern and Elijah’s hand slammed the pencil down against the sketchbook. He lifted his head and looked at the girl. The first thing that came into his head was ‘stupid question’ the second was ‘why the hell does she care?’ Elijah sighed and gestured wildly with his hands. “Irritation? Fury? Misery? Take your pick I’ve got loads more.” He muttered before dropping his head back onto his arms.

Aurora waited a long time for her answer. What was wrong is a simple enough question. Then she got a feeling of him wondering why she cared. "Well dont have to be so rude.. And by the way... I care cause im not a mean person like most people are..." She turned around and walked back to where she had been sitting beforehand then she sat down, took her note pad out and drew a kitten.

His remark hadn’t seemed rude in his mind but it wasn’t important to Elijah. He didn’t care how politically correct he was being or was supposed to be being... Elijah lifted his head. His eyes fell on the drawing and he hastily turned it over. He gestured for Zoe, one of the barmaids, to come over and the leggy blonde did as directed. He pointed to his glass and glanced up at her with his red-rimmed eyes. “Turn that into Firewhisky if you would, please sweetheart.” She nodded and took the glass away, returning to the bar and Elijah looked over at the girl. His hand went in front of his eyes and he massaged one of his temples with his thumb. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to be rude..” He said just loud enough for her to hear. He heard the glass hit the table and he offered Zoe a small smile before taking the glass and gulping down a fair amount. That was exactly what he wanted, alcohol to help with the angst

Aurora kept drawing her kitten. At least she wasnt drawing that stupid storm. When he talked she ignored him. She didnt care what anyone as rude as him said. If there was anything she hated more than herself being shy it was people like him being rude. What was so important to people these days about being rude? That question had never been answered.

Zoe made to retreat but Elijah caught her wrist and she looked down at him. He was a mess, a complete wreck and she felt guilty for leaving him. What choice did she have though? She didn’t have a responsibility to look after wayward artists. He didn’t have to depend on her. But he just wanted company. “I’ll get you another pint.” She murmured before moving back to the bar. Elijah let her go and his arm fell down. His watch slipped off of his thin wrist and he cursed. He bent down and captured the silver watch back into his hand. He fell forward a little but managed to push himself back up onto the chair without a problem. He sank lower into the seat and took another large gulp of the Firewhisky. He reached out and turned the sketch book over again. He held it in his hands and looked at Alice, taking her in, her memory. She was beautiful. She probably always would be. Of course she had no room to grow in his memory. She was trapped in a single form. He sighed and ran a hand through his hair once more before ripping the page out of the book. He took his lighter out of his pocket and a cigarette. He put the cigarette between his lips and clicked the lighter on. He lit the end of the cigarette before putting the flame to the corner of the picture. So there he sat, watching her burn, watching her die like he did last time, as out of control as he was before.

Aurora just sat there, thinking about the kitten she had as a todler. It had been a cute kitten, and very soft and fluffy. When she got it she named it puppy since she could say much. Puppy the kitten was cute.

Aurora's thoughts were cut short by her coughing. The smoke from the strangers ciggrette made her cough. She coughed alot and couldnt stop much. It was getting really hard to breath.