Christian couldn't really believe he was about to go into a club, nonetheless on a secret mission of sorts. He didn't realize how stiff he was being until Apollo gave him a shove and gestured towards Molly. The elder twin had the picture in his hand, along with a plan to burn it up once he saw Roxanne personally. Christian, on the other hand, was meant to go with Molly and play some sort of casual club-goer of sorts.
But at Apollo's nudge, Christian gave a nod and stepped into the mindset he needed to have, realizing he wasn't playing the part properly at all. His arm fell across Molly's shoulders as Apollo moved towards the bar as he was meant to do. Within moments of sitting down, the bartender was working on a drink for him, and he was pretending to chat up a brunette sat beside him. He had no idea who she was, of course, but that was hardly is first priority.
--
On the street, a slightly tipsy chef and shop owner was heading home from work. After talking to Yvette, he couldn't help the fact that his mind had begun to wander back to that morning and that last time he had heard from Dom. He wished he could claim it was the last time he had seen her, because he would have felt less ridiculous for clinging to the memory. But that wasn't the case.
Declan woke late, and he blamed it on having been up so late talking to Dom the night before. Merlin, but they'd actually done that, hadn't they? And neither had asked for anything beyond it, nor expected anything else. That, he would tell her, was what it meant to be in a relationship. Knowing the other person, and wanting to just spend the evening talking sometimes. Maybe all of the time. It isn't as though he wouldn't have accepted something more than that, had they been in the right place for it mentally or emotionally. But it wouldn't have been right to do something like that just yet. Even if she did look particularly charming in his shirt.
He realized belatedly that he was lying on his stomach, which he rarely did. His arm was spread towards the other side of the bed, so he searched blindly for the blonde in question. But the sheets were cold there. Shockingly cold. His eyes opened, concern already splashing into his expression. "Dom?" He called, his voice hardly carrying given it was still thick and low from sleep. Declan sighed and rolled over, pushing himself up. A hand unconsciously moved to push his hair off of his forehead. His head didn't ache as much as he really deserved for it to.
The flat was silent, aside from the yawn that left him, and he couldn't help but wonder if she had woken earlier and told him she was getting up. Maybe he just didn't remember it. He half wished she had stayed to coax him into waking, but he was grateful for the rest that had not come as easily during the past few months. Supposing she was in the kitchen, he threw back the covers and determined that he could make the bed later. After a few minutes in the bathroom to change, Declan was starting to feel highly uncomfortable. Why was it so quiet? Dom wasn't exactly the type to be quiet.
"Dom?" He asked as he turned the light off and left the bathroom. "Love, I was thinking - do you want to go to any of the Quidditch matches? Henry can get us tickets if you-"
There was no blonde behind the island or bar of the kitchen portion of his flat. Nor in the living room. Declan froze at the end of his hallway, anger setting his jaw and tension rolling up his spine. It took a moment, but he let his chin fall into a slow nod. Well, he thought darkly, at least nothing else happened. Not this time, anyway.
There was nothing else to do besides gets on with his day, unfortunately. So he moved into the kitchen, wondering if he had messed up so badly in telling her about his parents, or about Henry's shenanigans, or in-... Had she just stayed because she thought he would drink? He didn't want to believe that. He hated that it had come to mind at all. Besides, he wasn't allowed one evening of self-pity after everything? He hadn't indulged even once before last night, and now she was gone again.
He'd thought she was his-...
Wasn't she? She had promised to try. His hands found the mugs in the sink almost absentmindedly and he belatedly realized that Dom must have put them there. He couldn't fathom why she would clean up if she had somehow guilted herself into leaving. He glanced around, half expecting to see a plate or something that had been used. A flash of white caught his attention and he pulled up short. He hesitated, afraid that it would tell him what he most feared it might. But his gaze found the words and he let out a sigh, eyes falling shut. Declan wasn't sure if he was relieved because of it, or just additionally anxious.
His gut wanted to trust her. He felt with everything in him that he needed to, even if only for himself. He hadn't trusted anyone since Danica, and that had left a mark. A dark, purpled one, mind, for everyone to see and wonder about. But a mark on the inside, too. One that made him into something of an ass. one that meant he shouldn't have been able to even reach this point with Dom. So he had no choice, really, unless he allowed himself to be a coward. And Declan was now coward. The hat had told him so nearly twenty years earlier, and though he had believed it strongly then, a bit of him had been lost in the past two and a half years. It was about time he got that section of his heart - the one that had been chiseled away in the shape of Danica - back. He deserved to have the whole of it to offer Dom once she decided she could feel something for him seriously.
He wasn't afraid that it wouldn't be perfect. The only thing he was afraid of, now, was that it wouldn't be.
--
A shout went up across the street, snagging Declan's attention and directing it towards the club he passed so often but ignored so easily. A flash of red hair would not have usually caught his attention, but there was something odd about the woman's face.
After all that-
After everything-
Declan couldn't even make his mind form complete sentences as he realized what must have happened. Did she actually see him? For a breath, he was sure she had looked right at him, and if she had, he knew what she must have seen:
The triumph that had burned in his eyes when he had asked and she had said yes? It was gone, replaced with a singed sort of pain that Declan wasn't sure she would recognize. But it was the after effect of feeling so blatantly betrayed, and he couldn't help it this time when his emotions were laid out for her to find if she bothered to check.
The one thing that he had latched onto when she had yelled at him in his flat was the mention of her having agreed to go home with whomever was sent her way. The willingness to do what Roxanne said she ought to. Moreover, the ability Roxi had to manipulate people into believing what Dom did: that relationships were bullshit. But Declan had tried so hard to show her otherwise, and even after she had said she would try, it apparently hadn't been enough. He hadn't been either, then. Clearly. Because there she went, ducking into the club as though it meant nothing that he was stood there across the street like an utter fool.
Isn't that all he had been lately, though? For more than two and a half years now, he had been successfully making himself look like an ass because he cared so much. Merlin, he hated himself sometimes. Why couldn't he be like Henry, who never bothered to be interested "for real"? Or Keiran, who may have cared immensely about his wife, but who knew when it was time to step back and demand that they change things? Sure, it hadn't worked perfectly for them yet, but the younger man - Slytherin though he was - had a better handle on things than Declan did. And Henry was far from hurting, like the other two were forced to. Really, Henry had it the best. No wife to yell at him so randomly he got whiplash, or make him consider very seriously her threats of divorce. But he also didn't have a woman lying to him about wanting to try or wanting a life with him only to watch as he's knocked to the ground by their husband's fist. Or, in this case, as they turn and walk away despite his presence right in front of her. Declan had a feeling that his actions around Henry's brother had had something to do with the younger man's ways, but Declan still wished that he could be as careless, sometimes, as his best mate was.
It took a great deal of effort, but Declan forced himself to turn away from the club. No way in hell would he be seen in a place like that. Not because he felt it was reprehensible or anything like that. Not technically. No, he had just turned thirty the week before, which made him want to cringe at times like this, but it brought up a very seriously possibility. Was this what Dom wanted, then, more than she could want him? Perhaps she had realized that he was older and focused on other things, and had decided to classify him as boring. Perhaps she registered the age gap and wanted someone younger, who felt comfortable in clubs like this one and was more within her age range. Declan had no idea. But for the first time in years, he truly felt the weight of his age on his shoulders. Thirty years old, and he was standing outside of a club (thankfully not in a cliché'd shower of rain), watching the girl he thought he could love turn away from him.
Bloody hell. And he had thought that he needed a drink the last time he'd seen her! That had been nothing. This time, though, he didn't want a drink. Not another, anyway. He wanted to give up. To quit. There was no point in continuing to look for her, was there? He knew where she was now and it wasn't at all what he wanted. It wasn't what Dom had seemed to want, either, but what could he do? Declan hated public scenes, after all. His reputation had already been torn ragged after what happened with Ryan and Danica, and he definitely didn't need word getting around about his yelling at yet another blonde who didn't want him, this time in the middle of a club.
So he left. Finally, and without making a sound. He wasn't convinced, before his feet moved, that he had so much as inched one way or another since seeing her. Not until someone apparated nearby and frightened him as they rushed towards the corner of the street with their friend. Good luck, he thought darkly, tossing them a baleful look once he realized where they were headed. The disapproval there might have frightened them enough to cause it, but they ran across the street without waiting for the sing to switch to WALK.
But WALK, Declan did. Past his flat, past the Ministry, and straight into the building where his best friend lived. Because if anyone had a cure for whatever this terrible feeling was, it was Henry Tross, the greatest player of sport and women that Declan had ever known. And, beyond that -- the only person who had ever picked Declan over someone or something they should have loved more? That was Henry. In the morning, they would go to a Quidditch game and Declan would be allowed to whine like a teenaged girl about Dom, but only until their team of choice hit fifty points. After that, he would have to quit, as tradition demanded of him, and that would be it. He would work, and see Henry, and maybe visit his parents. But he wouldn't look for her anymore, and he wouldn't think about her (if he could help it. Which he couldn't. Obviously).
All in all, it would be one big, fat lie that he tried to live. And Declan would fail miserably.