Finding Femininity

"I think you're right. I think that's the only way we'll get it done. And besides, the more we stay close to her, without crowding her, the better off she'll be. She'll have a sense of having her life and her independence back, and I think you're right. I think it will help her stop fighting to have her independence back. Part of it is that she knows she was trained to take care of herself, and Burke is taking that from her. I think we can perhaps give her better balance and, at the same time, relieve Brian a bit of feeling like a failure because they've broken through his security over and over no matter what he does. They have to really be able to mentally survive whatever Burke and Gelding are going to dish out."

Cassidy smiled " right and if he does he'll have all of us to content with , united we stand, devided we fall... or is that the other way around " she said looking at him thinking it sounded better the other way " any way we'd beter get this food up and ready unless we want a stampeade of hungry men threw here " she said and chuckled as placed her knife in the sink for washing .

"The soup is just simmering now, so I do think we're ready," Angus said. "Nice job. Thanks. Alright. Lets go check on Khaat and see if she needs us to put the babies to bed." He went out of the kitchen and found Robert had already put Dakota to sleep on his shoulder. He was putting her to bed in the playpen in the living room.

"You want me to take her upstairs, Robert?" Angus asked.

"No," he said. "I want them right here where we can see them all night. Right here where there will be constant eyes on them." He looked at Khaat and went over to her gently. "Khaat? Is Abbey asleep?" She nodded. He gently took Abbey, who began to start to wake and fuss. Robert cuddled her and soothed her back to sleep. He put her in the playpen and covered her.

"Alright. So here's the plan. You all know what I"m going to say. Steven, Cassidy, Angus, Jack, Jess, I need you up and fresh during the day. I need people during the day that Khaat is comfortable with. I'm not surrounding her with strangers. I need you all to leave this to me and head off to bed and let me run this overnight. Kate will be coming and will help me keep things going. I expect you up, warmed up and ready to go at the usual time. Brian, I want you to take Khaat to her room. She needs to be out of all of this and she needs to really get some rest. Stay with her. I"ll bring up a sleeping potion for her but we need her to get some restful sleep. Any questions or issues with that?" Robert asked.

cassidy chuckled and looked at Angus , just as he had said it would back in the kitchen " nope " all three said in coruse and laughed softly so not to wake the girls. Cassidy shook her head and moved back to the kitchen just to make sure every thing was ready for the men she cought two pintching a sandwitch and chuckled ass he shooed them out telling them it was for later on. She shook her head and sighed then gave a yawn realizing just how tired she was , but she didn't want to go up she felt to wound up she wanted to make something , anything.

Brian brushed a feathery kiss against Khaat's cheek. "Come on. You don't have to sleep if you don't want to," he said softly. "Let's just go get out of all this confusion for awhile. Just you and me, alright?" She nodded. He stood up, standing her up with him. "Come on. Walk with me. Let's just go." He looked at the others. "I think I"m taking her upstairs now. Goodnight everyone."

He led Khaat upstairs and helped her change and into bed. He changed and decided to just hold her. She curled tightly into him, and he sighed heavily. He reassured her, and decided that if he were gentle, maybe she would finally talk with him.

Taking out some ingrediants she began making Italian Amaretto cake , she took out a vanilla pod, caster sugar, almond nougat , honey, Amaretto liqueur, Amaretto biscuits and double cream. Cassidy Split the vanilla pod down the middle and scrape the seeds out, adding them to the egg yolks in a large bowl then she Add the caster sugar and whisk for about five minutes until she saw the yolks become pale. Then In a separate bowl, she whisked the cream until it thickeed slightly and stoods in soft peaks smiling at how she ahd managed it. Next she Placed the nougat in a plastic bag and hit it with a rolling pin breaking it into small pieces, doing the same to the biscuits. She then Gently fold the cream into the egg mixture and then she added the nougat, biscuits, honey and liqueur and mixed well. In a separate bowl she whisk the egg whites until they stood up in peaks just like the cream she had whisked. slowly she fold the egg whites very gently into the rest of the mixture until it was all combined. finding a cake tin she lined it with cling film she spooned the mixture into it bringing the cling film together and sighing as she placed it in the fridge as she knew it would be ready the next day.
tidying up she placed her things in the dishwasher and wiped down the side.

When morning came, the glass of potion that her father had given her before bed was still sitting beside the bed. Brian had not insisted she take it. He knew that, sleep deprived as she was, she needed far more to talk to him. She needed to be with him, to bond, to talk about what had happened.

And she had needed to hear his commitment to her, his unwavering love and his strong belief that this was not her fault. She desperately needed his promise that, no matter what, he wasn't going anywhere. They had talked almost all night. She had sobbed for hours in the safety of their room, far away from prying eyes, until she had exhausted herself beyond any ability to do anything other than to sleep.

She hadn't slept for more than a few moments at a time before she woke again with a jolt. He had offered the potion to her, but when she declined he hadn't insisted, and she was grateful. When daylight came, he took her along down to the gym. He helped her simply do some small stretches while he worked out right beside her. He was only concerned about helping her relieve some of the pain from the stoved up muscles from yesterday. And he massaged a lot of it away for her. He knew this was going to take a lot of time, but he only had wanted to make sure she kept moving forward, got life back to normal.

He had taken her back upstairs when they were done in the gym, and he had simply joined her in the shower. A shower for two. He had simply been there to silence the horrors of her mind, to provide her love and support. He helped her through every motion of facing a new day. And it was tough for her. Had it been up to her, she'd have simply curled up in her bed and never gotten out again. He had shown her nothing but devotion and love. He had picked out clothes for her after her shower. A pair of old soft gray sweats that he had reluctantly allowed her to keep and now they were both glad they were still in her closet. She was not dressed for fashion, but it covered her bruises and wounds. Hid them. She felt more secure. He taped her ankles securely for her with sports tape for more support and handed her a pair of slipper socks.

Then he took her downstairs to greet the day. Her father was stretching a kink out of his back from being up all night. He smiled when he saw her. He simply came over and kissed her. "Did you sleep at all? he asked softly. She shook her head. "Don't worry. You will. Your mother went home to bring us clean clothes and to feed the animals. She'll be back anytime now. She'll be glad to see you."

Angus brought out two fresh mugs of coffee and handed one to Brian and one to Khaat. "Good morning," he kissed Khaat's cheek softly.

"Thank you," she said.

"Could I get some of that?" Robert asked.

"The coffee or the kiss?" Angus grinned.

"I have no desire whatsoever to kiss you," Robert replied dryly.

"That's what I thought," Angus laughed. "Be right back."

Cassidy walked in from the garden fresh black berrys held in a basket that was held in her hand. As she walked in and saw them she smiled having been up since 1 am she'd made sure the coffee pot was filled and all the trays had been washed and returned to where they had come from. " Morning Khaat, Brian " she said and looked at angus and smiled a little "Morning , but late arin't you?" she said passing him by and into the kitchen to make a summer fruit desert.

"A little," Brian said. "I took Khaat down to the gym with me. She's really stoved up and sore today. I wanted her to have a chance to stretch just a little bit and maybe relieve some of the soreness of all those injuries. We're not off by a whole lot though. I take it things must have gone smoothly last night. I didn't hear anything."

"Smooth as clockwork," Robert said. "Although, I am hungry. I hope Angus hurries up with breakfast. I let the night shift go already, Brian. We're on with the daystring now."

"I wondered when I didn't see them," Brian said. "Do I smell scones?"

"I think so," Robert said. "I think Angus overslept just a bit too, but we're in no hurry. He promised me apricot scones this morning."

"He makes good apricot scones," Brian admitted. "Where are the girls?"

"The night shift took over and took them upstairs for baths and fresh clothes near sunrise. They're fine," Robert reassured them both.

"Where's Steven and Jess and Jack?" Brian asked.

"Haven't seen them yet either. They'll be here soon. Patience, " Robert said.

Cassidy moved into the kitchen and placed down the blackberrys washing them she began to make the pudding huming to her self .


Jess and jack walked in talking to each other " yes you did i saw it clearly " she said grinning at him . jack held his hands up " I so have not go a tattoo" he said grining knowing ful well he had gone and got one with her name in it on his arm.

"ok you'll have no probems showing me " she turned to brian and Khaat " will you order him to showme " jess's face like a child denied their favorat treat but with a smirk " he snuck out last night and did something " she said knowing sooner or later she would see .

Steven walked in with Cara beside him she sat in the door way waiting her medalion catching the sunlight casting a gold dot on wall .