Amelia barely looked up when the professor spoke, her head rising only slightly higher to show that she was paying attention. She was taking in the words the professor was saying, but sort of like they were spoken in slow motion, from very far away. Knowing this was no way to go through the class, Amelia shook her head sharply to try to clear it, shifting in her seat to try to wake herself up. She could be tired later; for now, she had to focus.
The professor got through the lesson material quickly, and then make a quick comment about Jack’s newly appointed position as Hogwarts Champion. In other circumstances, this would have slid right off Amelia’s back, but seeing as it was part of the reason she had missed out on so much sleep last night, Amelia lingered on the words longer than she usually would have.
Amelia had not missed out on sleep because she was jealous of Jack winning, or because she felt as though she had failed to impress the goblet. No, that wasn’t it at all. Instead, Amelia had lain awake in bed thinking about a different type of failure, owed to a completely different person. Although Raoul had basically instructed her to put her name in the goblet again, to put herself back in the same position she had had only a year ago, Amelia had been too afraid. It was not the fear of the tasks or the attention – though both were intimidating, in Amelia’s case - but what had really kept her from entering the tournament again was the same thing that had kept her from doing most of the things she might have wanted to do in her life: her parents.
The last time Amelia had entered the tournament, it had been only a few days after she was announced champion before her mother had swooped down on Hogwarts, immediately pulling Amelia out of the tournament and even out of school. Her disapproval had been the worst Amelia had ever incurred from her mother, and although her father might have had other feelings on the subject, he had gone along with Antoinette’s fury and plan for Amelia’s rehabilitation into rule-following society. Amelia had worked her entire life to do everything her parents wanted, be the perfect daughter, and in that one gesture of entering the tournament, it was as if none of that existed.
Although Amelia had wanted to put her name back in the goblet – both to prove herself, as had been her reasoning last year, and to do what Raoul asked for once – the thought of her parents’ disappointment, the way they had acted toward her last spring… it was too much of a deterrent for a girl who had spent all of her life trying to be perfect in her parents’ eyes. And so when Amelia had been lying awake last night, it had not been jealousy that had been running through her mind. Instead, it was a series of what if’s, and the biggest question of all: what was she going to tell Raoul?
The shaking seemed to have woken Amelia up enough to be coherent, and when the professor paired her with Jack, Amelia harbored no hard feelings toward the new Hogwarts champion. The only difficult part was going to be dealing with Jack’s energy when she wasn’t feeling a lot of her own. Jack might not always have the most enthusiasm for the lesson or the professor, but she had a kind of energetic aura about her that Amelia didn’t think she would ever quite exude.
“I think I’ll start on the receiving end, if you don’t mind,” Amelia responded, standing up from the desk and pulling her wand out of the pocket of her robes. Jack’s words had confirmed Amelia’s guess that the Gryffindor’s energy level would be higher than her own. Although Jack seemed non-chalant in many things academically related, she was still talented, and Amelia wanted to start with defending so she did not waste what little energy she had this morning on an attacking spell, and then fail when it came to the actual point of the lesson.
“Whenever you’re ready,” Amelia prompted after backing up several meters, leaving herself and Jack standing facing one another in an aisle between the desks. Amelia placed herself in a defensive position and raised her wand at the ready, keeping her eyes on Jack in the hopes that when a spell came her way, she would know it early enough to defend against it.