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Welcome to Potter’s Army

Welcome to Potter's Army

We have been a Harry Potter Roleplaying site since 2007. If you're an old member we hope you come check out the discord link provided below. And if you're looking for a new roleplaying site, well, we're a little inactive. But every once and a while nostalgia sets in and a few of our alumni members will revisit the old stomping grounds and post together. Remember to stay safe out there. And please feel free to drop a line whenever!

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What’s Happening?
Since every few months or so a few of our old members get the inspiration to revisit their old stomping grounds we have decided to keep PA open as a place to revisit old threads and start new ones devoid of any serious overarching plot or setting. Take this time to start any of those really weird threads you never got to make with old friends and make them now! Just remember to come say hello in the chatbox below or in the discord. Links have been provided in the "Comings and Goings" forum as well as the welcome widget above.

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Post by Guest Fri Oct 01, 2010 1:34 pm

Prologue:

One bright and windy day a family of four was sitting in the living room. The parents Sally and Brandon Emerald were sitting on the floor with their three week old babies. The baby girl was named after Sally's best friend Ginevra. Gin (short for Ginevra) had beautifull brown hair,and green eyes, she was so beautiful and looked like her mother. The baby boy was named Jason he had short brown hair and looked like his sister with the same green eyes. They both looked alike in many ways but the one thing that told them apart was that Jason had a birthmark of a feather, a very tiny feather on his fore arm. The weather changed very fast and by the time it got darker the wind was blowing
in all different diretions.Trees were swaying and bushes were being ripped up by their roots. Sally and Brandon were getting worried, something was comeing and they had to protect their babies. When the house was investigated after the storm everything seemed fine except that the Gin and Jason had been wrapped up in their blankets and tucked into their crib with a blanket over top to protect from falling dust. Sally and Ethan was nowhere in the house it was as if the dissapeared . All the police found was a note which said,
"Dear whoever finds our babies and this note,
Please we trust that you will take our babies to our good friend Ginevra, she will take good care of them and is their legal god mother. Do not look at us as bad parents for abbanoning our children like this it was for their own protection, we didnt want to have to do this but we knew the day would come.
Sincerly,
Sally and Brandon Emerald"
After the police was done reading this they agreed the best thing to do was give the babies to their god mother Ginevra who which had arrived after the police read the note. So Ginevra took them home and put them in their already made room as if Ginevra knew this was going to happened what she didnt know was for how long.







CHAPTER 1: THE TWINS ELEVENTH BRTHDAY-
IN GINEVRA'S EYES



"The twins eleventh birthday had finally come, soon they would be getting their
letters from Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardy." thought Ginevra. Suddenly there was an knock at the door interupting her thoughts. Ginevra opened it and to her surprise, there was nothing there. She looked down and saw some letters she knew right away what they were "It's too soon" she thought sadly. She picked up the letters which clearly had the Hogwarts seal on them and walked into her house."Kids! Come here please. I have your letters." She eexcalmined yelling up the staircase . Gin and Jason came running down the stairs they knew what letters Ginevra was talking about. Excitdly they ran up to her and Ginevra gave them their letters and let Gin and Jason open them. "Wow I can hardly wait to go!" Gin said jumping up and down. Jason just stared, he wasnt as excited as his sister. "Tomorrow ill be taking you two too Diagon Alley to get your things ready for next week." Ginevra said staring at the kids "They grow up so fast." she thought to herself. Gin smiled, Jason just stood there and stared at the letter. There was another knock at the door, so Jason went to answer it. "Hello" Said two strange people he had never seen before. Jason nodded and held up a finger assuming they were for Ginevra and went to go get her. "There are two people standing at the door i guess they are here for you." Jason told Ginevra shrugging his shoulders and pointing at the door. GInevra stood up, confused as she wasnt expecting anyone and went to go investigate. When she saw who they were she stopped dead in her tracks."FREDDY! You might want to come here!" She yelled smileing and ran to hug the woman who was standing there in her doorway. Freddy peeked aound the corner and his mouth fell opened to see Sally and Brandon Emerald standing there after eleven years of not seeing them.



Last edited by Sally Emerald on Fri Oct 01, 2010 1:37 pm; edited 2 times in total (Reason for editing : needed some color)
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Post by Sally Ruby Sun Nov 14, 2010 2:17 am

Alright could someone please post and tell me if I should go on with rewriting my story or not so I dont completely waste my time and energy on it?????
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Post by Brynnley Aubrey Sun Nov 14, 2010 1:00 pm

i read the prlogue and the places where i think you mean to have paragraphs don't make since at all. and in the first little part you jump from talking about sally brandon and the kids then the wether, that is where the paragraph should change. 1 topic per paragraph.. atleast thats what i was told.
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Post by Aurora Nye Sun Nov 14, 2010 1:19 pm

i noticed the same thing. I see how the prologe thing.. it starts to far back for the story to begin at age 11. Most stories prologes tell what had been happening like a few weeks before hand not all the way back when they were babies so it doesnt make any sence. And everything is a blob. put them in paragraphs. it would be alot easier to read.
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Post by Brynnley Aubrey Sun Nov 14, 2010 1:39 pm

oh and grammar isn't the best though neither is mine. but i read this sentence which isn't completely right besides the fact that it could be made into 2 sentences....
After the police was done reading this they agreed the best thing to do was give the babies to their god mother Ginevra who which had arrived after the police read the note.So Ginevra took them home and put them in their already made room as if Ginevra knew this was going to happened what she didnt know was for how long.
After the police had read the letter they agreed the best thing to do was t o give the babies to their god mother, Ginevra. Ginevera had arrived soon after the police had called her. So Ginevera Took them home and put them into the rooms that had decorated as if she knew that this was going t happen all along. What she didn't know was how long they were going the children where going to be there.
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Post by Aurora Nye Sun Nov 14, 2010 1:51 pm

After the police had read the letter they agreed the best thing to do was t o give the babies to their god mother, Ginevra. Ginevera had arrived soon after the police had called her. So Ginevera Took them home and put them into the rooms that had decorated as if she knew that this was going t happen all along. What she didn't know was how long they were going the children where going to be there.

well n that..... i think it better a little as

After the police had read the letter they agreed that the best thing to do was to give the babies to their god mother, Ginevra. Ginevera had arrived soon after the police had called her. So Ginevera took them home and put them into the rooms that had decorated as if she knew that this was going t happen all along. What she didn't know was how long they were going the children where going to be there.

just a few changes Very Happy barely a thing Very Happy
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Post by Kole Kane Sun Nov 14, 2010 1:54 pm

well i messed up a little with the last sentence just take out the 'they were going'
then in what aurora said there would need to be the word been in between had and decorated
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Post by Aurora Nye Sun Nov 14, 2010 1:57 pm

put she ha decorated

that would work out perfectly Very Happy
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Post by Sally Ruby Sun Nov 14, 2010 6:59 pm

Wow well ya'll I did start this story when this site first started so I didnt know there was restrcitions or whatever and I didnt have the best of grammer when I was 14 neither. Now I think its kind of funny how those two particular paragraphs two years/ three years ago, people liked them and they were in worst condition then they are in now, Now I dont mind changing them but that would be a waste because in the end I would change them completely over and it would be a whole different story. The reason why the prologue starts out when they were babies, if you didnt get the point of it reading the first chapter, is that its telling what happens and WHY Ginerva has the babies when they are Eleven. I personally like it but if it is that badly written I dont see any point of keeping it, I might as well just come up with a new one? Now Rory I do agree with you about taking "They were going" out, I guess I hadnt read over it enough, I myself just spotted that misstake. Aurora and Stephany, Well Stephany first, The place in the prologue is the same place through out that entire paragraph, It never changed. Aurora Im not really good at putting things in paragraphs as I never know when to start a new one, thats why they are in a "blob".
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Post by Aurora Nye Sun Nov 14, 2010 7:03 pm

lol i could help u wit that Very Happy
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