"Miami, you can tell Bishop I don't give a shit about jurisdiction. This guy keeps popping up every time we deport his ass back to Brazil, and his threats against the Ministry are getting deeper and deeper, and his methods of getting back into the country are completely unknown to all of us. How he's getting past the wards, we don't know. That makes it a mystery, Miami. And where do we take mysteries?"
Claire's messenger, for that's all Jack would ever be able to view the Auror as, rolled his eyes, pursing his lips as he shifted his weight. She jutted her chin forward, staring at him. Waiting. He let out a sigh.
"Orlando."
Her eyebrows pulled even further inward, staring at the man with such confusion and surprise that one might think he had just told her that England had fallen into the sea.
"Excuse me?"
"You keep calling me Miami, but my name is Orlando."
"I know your name is Orlando."
"Then why do you keep calling me Miami?"
"Miami's another city in Florida."
"But why do you-"
"Christ, man, it's because of this! Really, how did you pass the intelligence exams, or are the state of things that anyone who can legibly sign their name can be an Auror-"
"I get it, you think it's funny taking the piss, but Ms Bishop doesn't." His face was stern now, as though he were kidding himself to have any sort of authority. He had been on the force maybe five years, but no amount of time gave anyone the right to tell an Unspeakable what they could or could not do. Because there was one beautiful loophole they could always pull out, and it was a commonly abused one.
Jack finally stopped, as the pair of them had been walking down the corridor of the Department of International Magical Cooperation, the file for Márcio Álvarez and his dozen or so aliases firmly in her grasp. They had reached the lifts, and she knew if she couldn't shake Miami here, she'd be stuck with him all the way to her department on level nine, until she could get their new security witch Lupita to send him packing.
"Miami-"
"You know my name!"
"This file is going with me. You guys have had multiple chances, and it's not working. There's obviously something deeper than stubborn criminality going on."
"What are you guys going to do about it?" And then came the loophole. Jack grinned and he was already groaning, having realized what she was about to say before she said. "Oh-"
"I really can't speak to that."
"-come on."
Jack gave his arm a sympathetic clap, reaching out to hit the button for the lift. "Don't worry about it, mate. If Claire really wanted the file, she wouldn't have sent you."
His face clouded with indignation. "I resent that."
She tilted her head. "How can I make it up to you?"
"Don't call me Miami."
"I can do that." The lift doors shuddered open and she stepped through, turning to look at the irritated Auror, a smirk tugging at her lips. "Later, Gator."
His face dawned with the realization. "Oh, come on, that can't be my new name-"
But the lift was hurtling off, and Jack was much too pleased with herself for her own good. She had been in the Ministry for nearly 24 hours straight at this point, having stayed late the night before to work a case before getting news about Alvarez. Their temp secretary, a tiny little Indian witch with a strength in her voice, had locked Jack into her office with a sleeping draught and forced her to get at least an hour of sleep, before giving her a concoction of energy potions to get the redhead through the day.
Jack hoped Karen stuck around. She'd love to see Fred get locked in his office one of these days.
In truth, Jack had been working even longer hours than before.The Falcons were taking a more laidback approach this year, still struggling to fill the spot Ivanov had left, and with her dad working through his mid-life crisis in the spare bedroom, Jack had more freedom than ever. She wasn't sure if she had almost lost her job at the start of summer, but the waves she had caused had revealed to her how important the work was to her. She had free reign to take on projects as she saw fit, had at her fingertips some of the cleverest people in the country, and very few people to answer to. It was an elite group, and Jack didn't want to see her time end there prematurely.
She, like many of her coworkers, loved the freedom. But they were addicted to it, scared to lose it. And so they tried to stay in line.
Jack had learned her lesson, for now.
The lift dinged and she stepped out, several memos flying in to take her place. She strolled down the corridor and turned, opening the secret door that led to their offices, immediately greeted by Lupita's grim face. Jack stepped towards Karen's desk and dropped the file. "I need an unreadable copy of this for Jet and Weasley."
"Can do. Did you guys really reverse the Delta experiment last night?"
"Karen, you know-"
"Oh, come on, they're going to wipe my memory when I transfer anyway. I live in the now."
Jack smirked and offered a shrug. "What Delta experiment?"
Karen got it and she grinned, shaking her head. "You lot are f-cking mad. 6 months all fixed in a day. Anyway. Sorry, for the swear - here's the copies."
"Never apologize for being you, Karen."
She swung by Fred's office, and after his nineteenth attempt to declare a curse upon her and her entire house, she finally forced her way in, threw the file at him, and managed to escape before his carnivorous waste basket took off her leg. She returned to her office to write out a memo for Jet, summoning her from the archives of the department, when Karen knocked on her door.
"It's lunch time."
"Thanks, mum."
The short witch cocked an eyebrow and a hip simultaneously. "Correction, it was lunch time an hour ago. And you haven't eaten breakfast either."
"Are you the spy we've been looking for?" Karen wouldn't be thrown from the trail though, so Jack waved a hand. "Could we order in?"
"Are you supposed to have food delivered to the most top secret level of the Ministry of Magic?"
"Well, they let you in."
"Jack."
"I thought you could pick us all up-"
"I have memos. I took my lunch break during lunch. Go eat."
Jack let out an exaggerated sigh and pushed out of her chair, snatching up a file. "I'm going to go live with dad."
The file was plucked from her hands and set aside. "You shouldn't carry secrets around. Go eat. Be nice to someone today."
"Bite me."
"Mother's proud of you."
Jack had changed her mind about Karen. She should be reassigned immediately.
Jack didn't often eat in the cafe. In truth, few of the Unspeakables did. They either left the building entirely, or took lunch in their offices, but Jack hadn't accounted for her extended stay, and she was beginning to get so tired that she didn't quite trust herself to not fall asleep in whatever unsuspecting bistro she found herself in. At least if she passed out at work she didn't have far to go when she came to. Her hair was mussed, and anyone who cared to notice would see that, beneath her robes, was the same clothes she had worn the day before. Her eyes had sunken even deeper than usual and she looked a mess.
It didn't stop her from making puns on the soup of the day, though.
Servers appropriately harassed, Jack took her sandwich and collapsed into the first table she spotted, propping her elbows onto the table to keep her from falling asleep right there. But the lunch rush was over, and the cafe was quiet, and Merlin, it was warm. She had to take at least a bite though, to satisfy Karen-Mum. She had to stretch her mouth wide to sample the sandwich and it transformed into a yawn. She tossed the sandwich onto her tray. "F-ck it," she said, reaching up to vigorously rub her eyes.
That was it, she was leaving early tonight.