A very, very hard kick impacted his knee, and if Fred hadn't undergone downright, grueling torture during Unspeakable training, his eyes would have watered.
Fred closed his eyes, slowly, as if begging for patience. Rather hypocritical of him, sure- but it was warranted. No, he wasn't asking Jack not to be violent. Asking Jack not to be violent was like....was like....asking Voldemort really, really nicely if he wanted to adopt Harry Potter. No, all he was asking was for Jack to be a little considerate about the health of the person she was directing said violence against. A couple more inches to the right, and it would have been bye bye to any future possibility of Papa Fred. And that, would be such a devastating loss to the gene pool.
Before Fred could cook up means to suitably retaliate, Claire piped up with her scintillating addition to the conversation. All right, not piped. More like inserted, in such a gloriously, supremely mind-numbing voice that Fred almost mourned the presence of such a sharp, snarky wit within such a drearily boring exterior.
His eyes flicked over her once, cursorily. Okay, only lament the metaphorical exterior then. The literal one was.......satisfactory.
"Well if it doesn't work out you could always take your own advice. If they took it this easily for me and Jack I'm sure you wouldn't have any trouble if you opted to, um, elope early."
"Right you are there, Matt." Fred patted the man on the arm generously, if only to see him twitch. His eyes swiveled back to Claire's, lips stretching out into a provocative smile. "I'm sure you'll find some random, unattached male who could be prevailed upon to.....ah, help out a lady." He didn't even need to say 'damsel in distress'. He and Claire rather excelled in imparting taunts in innocuous words.
Of course, he made the one mistake that every Gryffindor would be counted upon to make- spoke without thinking. The implication of his words, flying away gleefully like arrows that couldn't be yanked back, settled into his mind slowly, almost comically.
Random, unattached male. In this scenario of the Marriage legislation, where almost everyone was receiving their letter of doom. Almost. It would be nice if aforesaid male would be around Claire's age, too. And preferably work in the Ministry, with the same working hours.
What an absolute coincidence that he happened to fill all three criteria.
And this coincidence would not go unnoticed, thanks to his brilliantly unmindful words. Especially by a certain occupant of the room, prone to violence and seizing opportunities of revenge.
Fred turned his eyes to fix on Jack's, resolute and just with that edge of warning. Don't say it. You will not say it.