Why now?

Damitrius blinked at Talon when he started telling her that it wasn't her fault. "You don't get it!" she screamed at him. "This wasn't the only thing that I was talking about! Sapphire might've died from something I had no control over, but there are plenty of things I couldn't protect her from!" she said. Anger had begun to take her over and her eyes turned red her hair began to turn red at the tips and it grew showing her anger and how it was growing within her.

"I had to protect her from so many things! And I let her die without even knowing that she was dying!" she said. "I didn't even know until afterwards! My sister came I to the house and just told me that she died! I couldn't be there with her!" she cried. "I couldn't do anything for her! Those stupid bullies, I couldn't stop them from doing anything to her! They always teased her no matter how much I tried to protect her! You might not know this but Sapphire had been close to committing suicide twice! Twice because of those stupid Slytherin boys! She had to go to St. Mungo's twice because of them ..." she continued to cry, her eyes and hair turning a murky red from the sadness that had begun to mix with anger.

" ... She was my best friend ..." she said softly.

Talon lowered his head at Damitrius' sudden rage, trying to think clearly. She kept saying these things as if they were a valid point, but he knew she was only saying them due to her grief. He looked back up, a stern look on his face. "I know," he said calmly, a little edge on his voice "I know what happened with Sapphire, I was her friend as well. I tried to help her with whatever went on, I spent the night in the Shrieking Shack with her to try and calm her down a little. I know how you feel, but you gotta realize this isn't the solution." He moved his hands from her shoulders down to her arms. "You gotta realize that...even though her death was tragic...it doesn't have to hold you back." He felt his strength coming back to him now, even being able to make a small smile.

He then said "I know you have a right to be sad and mad, but you gotta look at this is a way that won't drive you insane...I should know, I've been down that road." Still are, too. Shut up! "The only thing I think Sapphire would've really wanted was to just see you be happy..." He choked up again out of nowhere, having no idea how that happened. He looked back down, fresh new tears forming on his face again "We gotta pull through this...for her." He damn near started sobbing too, but he managed to hold himself back. Wasn't ever healthy to repress feelings, but right now, he had to be strong for Damitrius. He just had to be, otherwise she would fall down the same hill as he did, and he knew how difficult it was to be able to climb back up that hill.

He had managed to see over the hill this time, and he wasn't going to let anything pull him back down. Now he just had to make sure he could help Damitrius over, she was his close friend after all. He gave Damitrius another hug, hoping that would possibly cool her down a little. He had been a little shocked at her changing act. Talon had never been able to fully understand that, yet it was a part of her, so he never minded...that was until she got angry like she was now. That was just intimidating.

Her hair and eyes changed from the murky red color to a dark gray when he hugged her again. She couldn't even respond to what he was saying anymore, she couldn't feel angry or happy, all she could feel was sorrow. The same sorrow that came with Kaily's death. But somehow, Sapphire's death was hitting her harder than Kaily's had. She had seen Kaily die, she'd seen her killed by a Death Eater and she was able to stun that Death Eater without him noticing her ... she was even able to bring the girl's body out of harms way afterwards. But with Sapphire, she hadn't been able to do anything. She couldn't even see her in her last moments.

Slowly her hair and eyes turned black from the gray that had been on them before. Anyone who saw her now would think she'd gone back to normal but her hair was darker than it normally was and her eyes had gone from a chocolate brown to a charcoal black. Her body's shaking continued and the tears kept falling, but she didn't move at all. Her body had stopped responding to what she wanted it to do and she just sat there letting Talon hug her. She wanted to move away though, she wasn't sure why but she wanted to move away. She wanted to shrink back into the corner of the compartment and just cry.

"For her ..." she finally said, echoing what Talon had said moments before but she didn't say much else. She just stared off into space, thinking about the deaths of her best friends.

Talon moved away from Damitrius for a second, wanting to see her reaction. Just as he thought would happen, she had sunken into that state of depression he himself at fallen into. Except it was more obvious on her seeing as how her hair turned black as well as her eyes. He put on a concerned look and placed his hand back on her right arm, trying to make things easier for her. It was odd how he was more caring towards her than he was towards himself, all he wanted to do was just leave the train and head back home. He didn't want to have to deal with going to Hogwarts...let alone any of his classes right now. He sighed and sat down with his back on the wall, his arms over his knees and his head leaned forward.

What would he say now? He hadn't the slightest idea, and in turn, it just made him feel even more shallow in his emotions right now. His mind was only on one track right now, and he still couldn't fully believe that Sapphire was dead. He shuddered from the amount of shock he had just received in such a short time, and he looked back at Damitrius. "If it means anything to you at all," he said softly "you still have me and Caiden...and we're not going anywhere anytime soon." Knowing how he went through his loss, it probably wouldn't matter to her, but at least he gave it a shot.

He reached into his pocket and pulled out his pocketwatch, another harsh reminded of someone he lost. It didn't affect him at all anymore, all he wanted to do was just check the time. Yet it was pointless to know what time it was, he hadn't the foggiest idea as to when the damn train was supposed to leave. It felt like an eternity. He reached into his other pocket and pulled out a small tissue bag that he had only recently carried on him. He came down with a cold the last week and he used up most of the bag for that time, but it was gone now and he hadn't needed it. He pulled out a tissue and handed one to Damitrius and pulled out another one to wipe off his eyes. Christ, it was going to be a long year.

Damitrius stared at the tissue that Talon held out to her for a while before taking it. But even after she took it, she only stared at it, not using it at all. Her hair began to change color again, slowly going back to a normal gray same with her eye color. She looked at Talon and then slowly raised the tissue to her eyes, wiping them gently so she wouldn't hurt herself. But she only kept thinking about Sapphire and how she'd be having fun and being all happy if she were there with them and it only made her cry more.

Her body had began to slowly stop shaking and she gasped softly as she tried to stop crying. "I doubt Caiden would want anything to do with me in school." she said softly. "He's a Slytherin ... I'm a Gryffindor, we'd get in trouble with our Head of Houses if they knew we were friends." she sighed. She didn't want to get herself or Caiden in trouble because of the stupid house rivalry that most of them hated. But nothing would change as long as there was greed and stupidity in the houses, which there always was.

Damitrius sniffled softly as she wiped her eyes again, her hair and eyes going back to their original color. But the sadness of Sapphire's death lingered within her, not allowing her hair and eyes to return to their original color fully. She didn't really care anyways, that sadness would always be there so she might as well get used to having her hair like that. "I'm sorry." she told Talon softly. "I didn't mean to put you through that."

"Caiden wouldn't care hopefully," he said softly, crumbling up the tissue with one hand "he gets bullied enough by the Slytherins, so it's not like he would care what they think." Even though Caiden had never told him directly about that, he always suspected something. His body language always changed whenever he encountered another Slytherin, and he knew that something must've been going on with that. Was he being bullied? He wouldn't know for sure unless he told them, but for now, that's what he was assuming. "We're friends, we stick together...ever since first year." He formed a genuine smile on his face as he remembered the beginning of his first year. It was a fun year, that was for sure.

Talon sighed once she apologized to him. "I'm glad I heard it from you instead of some professor," he said, starting to get a hold of his emotions "I'd rather find out about that stuff from my friends or family...although I wished it would never happen though." He had seen news about some sort of sickness ravaging the land, he even heard that several Hogwarts students themselves had perished because of it. Then, a curious thought came to him. Was someone poisoning the students? It had only been a short while of time since they last saw each other, so the disease must've hit the circulatory system quickly. Yet that one speculation clung to his mind. Someone was poisoning the students, that just had to be the case.

He looked back up towards Damitrius and put on a soft smile. "I think she'd want us to go on with the year normally...hadn't really known her for long, but I know she was a kind soul." Talon himself had never been religious, but now...now he wasn't sure. He never really questioned life in its ways until his grandfather died...the same question popping up now. He didn't want to think about death, about the things that came to an end, he just wanted everyone to stay alive until he was old enough to handle those things better. He clasped his fingers together and looked back down, some thoughts still shaky in his head. He didn't know what to say now.

"It's not like we can all just live forever." she said. Her eyes seemed to have gone lifeless and blank as she stared at the floor now. "It would be less troublesome if we could ... but sadly that isn't the case and we can't change it." she droned on, her words sounding lifeless. Her emotions weren't gone though, they'd just been pushed down. Anyone could tell they were still there because Damitrius' hair stayed a light gray mixed with black instead of going back to dark brown.

"Sapphire was a ... special kind of girl." she said. "I've known her for a while and she was always so innocent and she could make anyone laugh with her words or actions. She was always lively and happy no matter what." she continued. "Even ... when those Slytherins were bullying her." her voice shook as fresh tears stung her eyes. She blinked them away and sighed. It was hard to talk about the girl now, even though all she was saying was nice things about her. She brought her legs up close to her chest and buried her head in her knees.

"I hate death."