Fade me out

Clair slammed into the dorm, more from force of habit than anything else, since he already knew everyone was still at the party.

He dumped the bottle in the drawer of his bedside table. Nothing good could come of trying to drown his sorrows. Drinking by himself only ever led to a hangover and sometimes, split knuckles. Besides, he didn't have any sorrows to drown.

God, why was he so stupid? He flopped onto his bed and stared at the canopy while he tried to sort out the mire his mind had degenerated into over the course of the evening.

He wasn't in the common room. As if that would stop her.

She, of course, had no proof that he was in the dorm either, but that was hardly going to dissuade her. She had been lucky she hadn't run into anyone, as her outfit didn't really have any sort of hiding place for the bottle of gin she had lifted. She paused to take a drink, setting the bottle down as she caught sight of herself in a reflective wall decoration, turning to adjust her hair before heading up the stairs to the boy's dorms.

She stopped at the fifth door and shouldered her way through, holding up both the bottle and the cup. "Excuse me, we had a bet going," she announced, an unamused look on her usually mischievous face. She spotted a pair of legs and veered towards that bed, turning and sitting on the edge of his bed, setting the empty cup on his stomach, resting the bottle of gin on her knee.

He was tempted to tell her to get lost, but for all he knew, she would actually leave and Clair didn't want that.

"How much do I owe you?" he asked apathetically.

He moved the cup and sat up. Belatedly, he realised they were both still under the influence of the veritaserum and she might not be able to extort too much money from him. On the other hand, she could definitely extort other things.

"I reckon you don't care about the money," he said. "I reckon you're here to interrogate me."

"Of course, we could just skip that and go straight to the part where I go down on you."

He sounded pretty miserable. Which wasn't the point of the party. Or the point of her leaving the party. If she wanted to hang out with someone miserable, she would have gone after Apollo.

She frowned, but tilted her head. "Probably nothing, actually. I didn't get any of our specific couples to kiss. But I do take credit for basically all the kisses that did happen." And that was the truth. She knew that very little of what had happened would have occurred without her interference. Possibly none of it.

It had been her party.

"I'm here to cheer you up," she corrected.

Oh.

Her breath hitched, more surprised at the suddenness than the proposition itself. She wasn't great at math but she knew personalities like herself and Clair added with alcohol could easily lead to something more... private. Add the backdrop of the boy's dorms and it was almost unavoidable.

And usually, Margo would have already been kicking off her heels.

But he had to tell the truth.

"Do you actually want to? Or are you just upset about Kapur?"

It wasn't gentle or pitying. It was a genuine probe for an answer. Because she was certainly more than game, and wanted to know what exactly she was in for.

Clair shook his head.

"You can't take credit for Violet and Jules," he said. "That was all her and Apollo.  Besides, he's not even sure if anything happened."

He moved to the edge of the bed so he could sit beside her.  

"Well, that's complicated," he said, "since I was only offering to distract you from asking me about him. That didn't work, so I'm not sure if I do want to, now."

"I'm upset about Julian," he said, blinking rapidly.

He was upset? He didn't feel upset. Jealous, sure. Clair wasn't about to lie to himself about that. Maybe slightly depressed. Okay, he supposed he could be described as upset, but he hadn't really linked that to Julian until it came out of his mouth.

"Okay, not what I thought I was going to say. Maybe I'm a bit upset about him, but I'm not upset at him, or anyone else. Except Apollo and Violet."

"Mostly I'm just confused."

"Truth or dare only happened because I freaked out Charlotte. So those kisses I count as mine," she pointed out, but she offered him a grin instead. "You don't have to pay me. The rules were fuzzy at best."

She'd probably regret bringing up Julian later, if that were the case. She had spent the whole night trying to get everyone else to get freaky. Seemed unfair she didn't get her share. But it certainly wasn't as though she were starved on that front.

And she was finding her brief alliance with Clair actually had made his own well being strangely more important in the moment than what she could get out of him.

Was this growing up?

Or was this branching out?

Confused was certainly a better word for it, seeing as he had Veritaserum in his system and still couldn't land on the sensation. She absently unscrewed the bottle as he spoke and took a quick drink, finding that she really hadn't drank much, considering. And maybe she'd prefer having a fuzzy memory if she was going to have to tell the truth, and not get laid in the process.

"Did you think it was just a physical thing?" she asked, tilting her head as her eyes flicked over his features, tracing his profile. "And now you're not sure?"

"Sure, sure," Clair agreed. "But not whatever happened with Jules and Violet."

"How many even were there?" he asked. "You and Cassie, You and Jules, Cassie and Jules, Charlotte and Christian, probably. I feel like I'm missing someone so call it five sickles?"

He watched Margo drink and tried to decide whether he wanted more tonight. Mmm, probably not. Nothing that wasn't water, anyway.

"No," Clair gave her a stony look, "because I'm not a character from a soap opera."

"It is just physical," he said. "Or like, close enough as makes no difference. But it's obsessive, too. I haven't been able to get him out of my head since that corridor thing."

"No, that wasn't me," she said, frowning briefly. But it fell into a grin and she tilted her head. "Keep the money. Owe me a favor."

Yeah, that was worth more than five sickles.

She rolled her eyes sympathetically at his words, mumbling a little defensively, a shot of good humor keeping her tone light, "Just checking."

She hummed thoughtfully, drumming her fingernails on the bottle rhythmically.  "I've been there," she admitted, because everything was moreorless a confession on veritaserum. "It's frustrating. It usually ends in me just getting them out of my system or settling for the next offer to come around and hope that clears my head. Not sure Julian would be up for that, with his whole 'please dear god let a girl look at me' schtick."

She tilted her head and gave him an appraising look, her lips quirking into a thoughtful pout. "You don't seem like someone who wouldn't have a plan of attack."

Clair nodded.  Margo was being very nice by sitting here essentially listening to him whine.  More nice than he had any right to expect anyone at Hogwarts to be, considering the way he treated most people.  Five sickles wasn't much, and he knew she deserved the favour more.

"The 'please-let-a-girl-look-at-me' thing is his problem, not mine," Clair said. "That's the thing, I don't care about girls looking at him."

Caught on a technicality, the veritaserum let that one slide.  

"I just... I don't get why he has to be so uptight.  It's not like I want him to date me or anything."

Clair tilted his head to grin at Margo.

"'Cause I don't date."

He raised his eyebrows at her next question. Did he have a plan of attack? He'd thought about it, and attack was certainly the right word. Clair sighed.

"I've thought about it more than once, but you gotta be careful about these things," he said.

"I mean, I could push him up against a wall and go from there. He probably wouldn't even be able to do much if I got the jump on him. But that'd be a dick move."

"The other one's like, we're still friends, y'know? So I figured I'd give him some time to get over freaking out before I brought anything up again. That kinda depended on him still being desperate for attention, though, 'cause I'm not an idiot. I know if he manages to get a girlfriend, I've got no chance."

Clair looked at Margo. It probably wasn't great fun listening to his pathetic problems, yet here she was. And providing more insight than most of the school probably would have thought her capable of. He figured he might as well take advantage of the situation as well.

"So what about you?" he asked. "Is that whole dumb blonde thing an act or do people just assume you're stupid because you're better with people than grades?"

Margo knew what it was like to be pitted against an uptight population. It was probably why she would rather dip out of a party and chase after Clair, because she suspected the fun would start to dwindle when there wasn't someone operating on her level of mischief.

She would have never been able to consider Julian uptight, not through her perspective, not when he jumped at any in she gave him.

She flickered a smile at his words, a pleasing moment of camaraderie. What she did probably wouldn't be called dating, either. Not really.

She let him talk, deciding that veritaserum already increased the potential of her saying the wrong thing, so it might be best to hear the whole story first. She was used to the possibility a night might bring, especially one featuring a party, but she had to admit - a heart-to-heart with Clair Savauge was not something she could have predicted.

"I feel like people are desperate to show who they are, rather than be," she mused. "Julian wants to show people he's cooler than he is. So, anything that doesn't fit his vision of that is going to set him on edge. It's shitty." She unscrewed the bottle again, swirling its contents before lifting it to her lips. "Maybe he needs time. Maybe you should tell him he's being an arse."

But what did she know. The one friendship she had ever actually had had been full of friction lately.

Her eyes lifted to his at his question, and she felt a small, thankful smile fall onto her lips. "You're nicer than you let on," she told him, before shaking her head with a grin. "It's probably a pretty even half and half, act and not. Don't get me wrong. I'm useless most of the time, and I'm lucky I even got one good OWL grade, let alone the handful I got. But the few times I'm smarter than I'm given credit for, it doesn't seem to be worth it to correct anyone. Helps keep expectations low, too, which makes for an easier life."

She paused, thoughtfully. "But it's not a matter of me being better. Definitely not. Much too selfish for that."

She realized that this last statement, at the least, was something she would have said without the serum. Somehow, though, it caused a small pang in her somewhere to hear it aloud. So this was what she thought of herself.